Without thinking about what he's doing right now, Harry runs into the bathroom to grab his shaver again.
Within a few seconds, his wrist starts bleeding again. The pain is insufferable but this time, Harry doesn't stop.
He keeps pressing the blade against his flesh, deeper and deeper.
The pain is a feeling of liberty. Harry feels like he's getting strong by standing against the pain. He is loosing the thoughts about Louis for one second and that's what makes him feel better.
When Harry loosens the shaver and looks down at his wrist, he frightens by the view.
Blood is streaming out of the wound and it doesn't stop.
Suddenly the wound starts burning horribly and Harry sees nothing but black. He grabs the sink to not knock over.
The pain doesn't stop so Harry sits down and tries to calm down his breath. There's no one around, he needs to make this on his own.
Slowly he starts seeing more than just black again. The wrist still burns but he gets used to it. Harry carefully stands up to walk to his dresser.
Harry grabs an old black scarf and starts wrapping it around his wrist to stop the bleeding.
It burns horrible but Harry keeps going on.
He looks at the big scarf around his wrist. For now it's okay but he can't go out of his room with this thing around his arm.
For a second Harry thought he would knock out.
There's actually not a reason but harming himself helps him to calm down.
Simon made it. He finally made Harry loose control, he isn't scared of hurting himself anymore. He finally noticed that he is worthless and that Louis is better without Harry by his side.
That's what Simon wanted Harry to believe. And he finally did so now Simon can stop forcing Louis to hide himself.
Louis can be free now. But Harry, well he is going to lock himself in the closet. But it's worth it, for Louis Harry would do anything.
Harry stays in the bathroom a few more minutes, pressing against the wound to stop the bleeding.
The pain is horrible but Harry ignores it. He made this so he has to accept the pain.
A bandage wrapped around his wrist, Harry walks out the bathroom. The wound burns heavily but he tries to ignore the pain.
Harry needs to take a walk, he needs some fresh air.
He walks downstairs, out the door. No paparazzi around, no Louis or Simon. Just Harry himself walking along the street.
It's a sunny day and the sun shining on his face makes him calm down. Sitting down on a bank he tries to breathe deeply in and out.
Zayn once said "Fake it till you make it" and probably he's right.
This whole situation isn't worth it and Harry should better focus on the good things in live.
He isn't sure if this will work but he won't give Simon the feeling that he made him loose hope.
Not now.
__
Omg didn't expect I'm going to write this way. It hurts me thinking about the boys not feeling okay tbh...
Anyways I hope u enjoyed the chapter, see u soon.
Xx
YOU ARE READING
These high walls || L.S.
Fanfiction!TW! Harry thought it would be easy. He thought love is unconditionally. At this point Harry was wrong. He had to bear the risk for the love of his life. But sometimes, trying to protect is not enough.
