Tomorrow Will Come

Thirty six

"I don't get why you wanna go so bad." Jennie sighed, taking Mary's hand as they sat in the infirmary, sat on the exam table, their legs dangling off the side of the bed as they picked at a small bowl of apple slices.
"Because it's my duty."
"No," Jennie sighed, "it's not. You're a council member, and a doctor, and a fighter. You're also a teenager."
"My dad would want me to fight."
"No," Jennie said gently, "he'd want you to stay here and be safe."
"No. I mean," Mary half laughed, "he wouldn't like it. He wouldn't like it at all, I know that. I'm not stupid. I know he'd probably want me home, being a kid. But I'm not. And I never will be. He wouldn't like it, but he'd respect that I'm doing something I believe in. He'd be proud."
"You'll stay safe?"
"Yeah," Mary smiled, "of course. Always. You don't need to worry about me, Jen. Come on. We're products of the apocalypse."
"Alright. I'll see you tomorrow morning?"
"Of course. See you then." Mary smiled softly, hugging Jennie tightly before she left, the pair kissing briefly before Jennie left, leaving Mary alone in the infirmary.
The girl bit her lip, then looked at the diary; she had an appointment at six pm, half an hour away, but that was it for the day, so she still had some time to kill. She cleaned around the room, but it only took a few moments; Siddiq liked things to be kept tidy.
"It's fine." Mary sighed, then shrugged, and locked the infirmary door, pulling the ultrasound closer to the table. In a swift movement, Mary rolled up her shirt and unbuttoned her jeans, then squeezed a little jelly on her stomach, squirming a little from the coldness of it.
Mary breathed in shakily, then shook her head, and breathed out slowly. "You need to know one day." She assured herself, and with that, she began to scan her abdomen, pressing gently around her old bullet wound from that ancient gunshot wound. And she saw what she knew she would.
Under the scar, the huge, nasty scar from the bullet, she saw the scar tissue surrounding one of her ovaries and Fallopian tubes. It was bad, she knew that. She knew she'd struggle to have children, and she understood then why she'd still feel pain there sometimes.
Mary sighed shakily, and wiped her stomach clean quickly. It wasn't the worst news for Mary- she doubted she'd ever physically have a child - and she already knew this would probably be the case for herself. But it did hurt a little seeing it for herself. Confirming it to herself.

"Moo?" A voice whispered through Mary's door that night, as Mary tried to position herself comfortably, her chest hurting a little, her hip cramping.
"Yeah, bud?" Mary asked softly, correctly presuming it was RJ. A tiny hand opened the door, and there stood a sleepy RJ, wrapped in the blanket Mary knitted for him, his feet covered by a pair of tartan pyjamas, two sizes too big.
"I had a bad dream." He mumbled, tiptoeing to Mary's bed, and sliding into it next to his eldest sister.
"Yeah? D'you wanna talk about it?"
"You went on the run tomorrow. And you died. You didn't come back. Like daddy hasn't come back."
"No, my JJ. No. I'm not gonna die. I... RJ, I promise. I promise I'll come back, and I never promise things like that. You don't need to worry about that." Mary soothed, guilt building up in her stomach. She finally understood how Carl felt when she would panic about his safety. Helpless. Safety isn't promised in this world, and Carl knew that, and Mary had learnt that. She knew she shouldn't promise RJ she'd be safe, but she knew what it was like to be the scared little sibling.
"Pinkie?"
"Pinkie promise." Mary nodded reluctantly, letting RJ intertwine their fingers. "Now, go to sleep."
"Can I snuggle your Carl Bunny?" RJ whispered, his voice less anxious, more tired.
"Yeah. Yeah, okay." Mary nodded, getting out of bed and finding the teddy for him, then holding her brother in her arms, quietly singing until she drifted off to sleep herself.

"I still don't want you to go." Michonne sighed softly, braiding Mary's hair, keeping the front wisps out of her face, giving her almost the same style as Judith.
"I'll be fine. The others are there. I'm fine, mom."
"I know. You're more grown up than anyone. More grown up than you should be at fifteen."
"I suppose it's a Grimes family tradition."
"I love you. So much." Michonne whispered, tying Mary's hair secures then kissing her temple.
"I love you too. I'll be fine, mom. I promise."
"You'll stay with your Uncle Aaron?"
"Of course. Jude! Jay! I'm going!" Mary shouted, hearing feet run down the stairs.
"Bye! I love you!" RJ squealed, throwing himself into Mary's arms.
"I'll be back before you know it. I love you more, okay?"
"Okay." RJ nodded seriously, kissing Mary quickly, before standing up and stepping away, letting Judith hug her.
"I'll be fine." Mary assured her quickly, noticing that Judith was hugging her a little tighter and longer than normal.
"I know you will. Weirdo."
"Love you." Mary whispered, feeling Judith nod and squeeze her tightly one last time before letting go. "Just one or two nights."
"Mommy's not gonna sleep."
"Then you'll have to sleep in her bed," Mary replied to RJ, "to make her less worried and less alone."
"Let's be real," Michonne half laughed, lightening the mood, "he sleeps in his own bed as much as you did at that age. He's in your bed almost every night, mine if not."
"Just like me," Mary chuckled, "I don't think I even started sleeping alone until I was, like, seven."
"No, it was always in Carl's bed. You had your own bed, and you'd start off in it, but by morning you was almost always asleep in his."
"Child of the apocalypse, what can I say." Mary half shrugged, making Michonne smile sadly.
"Alright. Time for you to be getting off. Go say bye to Jen, and meet Aaron."
"Yeah. Bye." Mary nodded, kissing her siblings once more, before hugging and kissing her mother and leaving.
"Alright, kiddo, you got everything?" Aaron asked as Mary walked into his house, a backpack on her back.
"Yeah. I'm ready. Ready to get gone." Mary nodded, letting Aaron ruffle her hair over her hat.
"Okay. I'll meet you in the car, yeah? Gonna drop off Gracie." Aaron nodded, putting an arm around Mary, then passing her an apple, the pair leaving and getting Gracie who was playing in the garden.
Mary smiled as she watched Aaron and Gracie leave, then went to Jennie's house, letting herself in as she'd always been told to do.
"Hey! Ready?" Toby asked, jogging down the stairs.
"Yeah. Just thought I'd say bye, walk over with yer mom."
"Jen's in her room." Toby smiled softly, moving aside, letting Mary go up them.
"Hey." Mary whispered, opening the bedroom door to see Jennie, half asleep in her bed.
"Already?" Jennie whined, rolling over to look at Mary, a blanket half thrown over her chest, bare feet poking out of the end of the bed, a blue hippo stuffed animal by her head of messy, black hair.
"Yeah. Already."
"C'mon." Jennie sighed, sitting up, making room for Mary beside her. "I'm worried. We're... We can live through everything. We've been through it all. But I don't like you going, and me staying here. I can't help."
"You don't need to come. You're helping me by staying here. Staying with Jay and Jude." Mary argued gently, letting Jennie put a sleepy arm around her. They stayed like that, in silence, for a few minutes, until Nira shouted up the stairs, telling them they needed to leave.
"Come back." Jennie whispered, kissing Mary softly.
"I will. I'll come back. It'll be fine."