When Shade joins a reunion on Chen's old island along with the other elemental masters he promises himself to stay away from them as much a possible, hiding all the evidence that he's depressed in his suite, his knife, his diary and his book of rules... the rules he writes down based on things others say to him. He's on number 188 and the purpose is that when he reaches 200... he'll kill himself. But what if somebody finds out about his state? This story includes self-harm, abuse, and rape. If you're sensitive to any of these things don't read it! Otherwise, enjoy it!