Spotlights

Connor in the Bathroom

Connor wanted to stab someone. 

The reason was unclear to him, though he suspected it had something to do with Zoe being an absolute bitch. He attempted to clear his thoughts, focusing on driving. But the anger was still burning in him and it needed someway to escape. But letting it out was not exactly an option right now as he was behind a wheel, and Connor certainly wouldn't take it out on Evan. And so he needed a distraction. 

"Did you ever figure out what you're supposed to be auditioning for?" Connor asked, breaking the awkward silence. 

"My mom sent me the script, it seems we're supposed to be doing a rendition of 'A Midsummer Night's Dream'" Evan's voice was dripping with anxiety. 

"Well, there's no fucking way I'm auditioning, so you're on your own for that one. But if you want I can help you rehearse after school."  

"R-really, are you sure?" Evan asked, bunching the hem of his shirt in his hands. Connor had to admit the outfit was rather big on Evan, but he pulled it off well. 

"I mean, I've got nothing else to do." he responded, shrugging nonchalantly.  

"A-alright, thank you." 

Connor just shrugged again. It had been years since he'd been this nice to someone, since the age of thirteen all he'd done was shut people out of his life, fearing if he let anyone past the barrier he built around himself nothing good would come of it. But there was something different about Evan, it was almost as if Connor couldn't help but be open with this boy. It sounded ridiculous and cliché but that didn't make it any less true. 

After another ten minutes or so of driving in silence, Connor finally pulled into the school parking lot. They were relatively late, and Evan didn't seem to be taking it very well. Connor was late almost everyday, and so he was unfazed by the fact that they should be in third period by now.  

Climbing out of the car, he grabbed his bag and waited for Evan to follow. The two boys entered the school, heading towards their history class. They made light conversation simply to keep from walking in silence, but Evan's trail of words cut off when Connor breezed past the classroom door. 

"U-um you passed the door-" he said, though continued to follow Connor as he wandered down the hallway. 

"I know." 

"So, what are we doing?" 

"Well, lunch is next, so I'm  going to go hide in the bathroom until then. What you're going to do is up to you." Connor said, shoving his hands in his pockets and speeding up his gait. A part of him hoped Evan would follow, another part wishing for time alone to think about the events of the last two days.  

Connor couldn't tell if he was relieved or disappointed when Evan turned back and entered the classroom. Instead of dwelling on it, he pushed open the door to the bathroom and quickly turned the lock. 

He went to sit in the corner, wrapping his arms around his knees and staring up at the ceiling. Connor was determined to think of something other than Evan, but his thoughts inevitably drifted back towards the timid boy.                                                                                                                             

The question that was repeating in his head was simply why? 

Why had Connor gone back to sign Evan's cast that first day? 

Why had he felt compelled to sit down and talk to the boy who was alone in the corner? 

Why had he invited Evan to his house?    

Connor thought back to earlier in the morning. Neither boy acknowledged the fact that they had woke up in each arms since Evan had freaked out. He hadn't meant to scare Evan like he had, but it was a rather strange experience to wake up cuddling with someone you don't really know.

Questions were flooding his brain and he had answers for none of them. The only hint at an explanation he had was the surge of anger he felt when Zoe had grabbed Evan's arm. The second Connor felt the frayed edges of the cast on the tips of his fingers, he instantly regretted it. He hadn't meant to reach for Evan's broken arm, and he had been ready to apologize right then if Zoe hadn't cut in.                                                                                                                                             

When he had apologized to Evan, it sounded pissed off and insincere.  

Finally, the bell rung, signaling he could leave for lunch. Connor wasn't all that hungry, but it was better than sitting in a classroom listening to a teacher drone on about something he was never going to use in life.  

He moved out of the bathroom, making sure no one saw him as slipped out the door and down the hall.