wild summer | #wattys2021

chapter two

James' pov

I pull into the familiar parking lot of our apartment. Lately it doesn't feel like our apartment though. I look at the cream colored building with its expensive touch. Maisie was so excited when we first moved in together. I was always eager to come home to find Maisie looking cute with her messy hair hovering her scripts, or watching a chick lit on the tv while wrapped in a blanket.

But now I'm dreading going inside. I miss my Maisie so much but these past few months she's been so busy with her practices, plays, and don't forget the after parties, the celebratory parties, and the we-have-no-class-so-let's-have-fun party. Yes she invited me along to all her parties, but I'm not really a party guy. She knows that and yet she wants me to be a part of her world anyway. She drags me to her parties, asked me to start a conversation with her friends so we could all get along, but some of her friends are fake and I don't like starting up a meaningless conversation. Sometimes I tried, for her, but other times I'm just tired so I'd rather stay home while Maisie have fun with all her rich friends.

I remember that one time, our uni was having a summer ball. Maisie asked me to dance with her but I refused because there was too many people on the dance floor and I hate the crowds so I escaped to the locker room, leaving Maisie alone. I thought I must had hurt her feelings and I tried not to be a shitty boyfriend so I decided to take her to the dance floor, but when I returned I saw Maisie was dancing with another guy. I think she was dancing with Edmund, I never liked him.

I can feel her drifting away from me. Everyday we get a little bit further away, and I hate it. I don't want to lose her. So today I came back early, hoping we could order pizza and have dinner together. 

I opened the front door as quiet as possible, not sure if I'm ready to face Maisie yet. I tossed my keys into the little bowl and walked into the living room.

I found her sitting on the sofa, legs pulled up and her chin on her knees. Maisie got off the couch once she saw me, her eyes wide. I let my eyes trail down the lines of her body. She's in a white blouse with a long pleated skirt and had her make-up on. God, she's beautiful. Of course I still remember every inch of her skin. I miss touching her. I miss seeing her eyes flutter close and her bottom lips between her teeth while I do sinful things to her.

She looked at me, a bit shocked which I don't know why. Don't tell me she doesn't recognize my face anymore. 

"Why haven't you answered any of my calls?" she asked. 

"My phone's dead." I replied.

She sighed, probably contemplating what to say next. So I ask her, "You're all dressed up. Are you going out?"

"I need to leave in half an hour. They want to go through the scripts tonight. I will have dinner with them. I wasn't sure if you'll come home, so I didn't make dinner." she said.

I didn't answer. I opened the fridge and my eyes looked through the contents, not really sure what I was looking for.

"Do you want me to order anything for you?" Maisie asked.

"No, it's fine. Why are you still here? I thought you have to leave."

She sighed. "Why are you like this? What happened to you? What happened to us, James?"

"We're not having this talk right now, Maisie." I responded, clearly agitated with the tense atmosphere in our little apartment. I stomped into our bedroom, knowing that she was following me because I heard her little angry footsteps.

"Oh we're going to talk right now. You don't get to walk out on me, James. Look at us. What happened to us?" 

"What happened to us? No, what happened to you, Maisie? You've always been busy. Always too busy for me. Apparently your acting and your friends are more important to you." 

"They are part of my life, James. I thought you knew that already. And I always asked you to join us but you're the one avoiding. You've changed, James. You don't even say you love me anymore." I swear I can see tears prickling in her eyes. I hate to see her cry, especially if it's because of me.

"I don't want to hang out with your friends, Maisie. I want to spend my time with you, just you. But of course you choose your friends over me. Yeah, I know I've been acting busy lately but that's because I'm treating you the same way you're treating me."

I think hard about the past few months, when Maisie went out having dinner with her friends or partying and dancing with who knows who. Meanwhile I wait alone in our apartment with no one to talk or to kiss.

Her eyes fixed on me, eyebrows furrowed in disbelief. "You're right, I was out a lot. I was busy with practices, with classes, but I'm also trying to make our relationship work. But it seemed really one sided sometimes. As if it didn't bother you as much as it bothered me."

I was scowling as I said, "Only now I realized how different we are. You're always busy, and I'm always alone. It's like we don't exist to each other, don't you think?"

"You were practically living in the drama department with all your acting friends." I mumbled as I looked down at the picture frame of us together on the bedside table. "How much longer are we going to pretend this relationship is going to work?"

"Don't even think about it. I'm leaving." she said and walked out of our bedroom.

I'm not sure if she's leaving to see her friends or leaving me and our relationship for real. I'm not ready to lose her but looks like I'm left alone again as another of her work taking her away from me.

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i personally love writing in james pov, just saying.

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