The Real You || Jung Sungchan

Chapter 14

Miyoung:

After Sungchan walked me back home after we finished talking at the river, I remember smiling so much. Nobody was home at the time since my parents work late at night and my brother was at his dance academy. I was so happy that I threw myself on the couch and almost started screaming. We left the river at 7pm and I got back home at around 7:30 or 7:35. I was so happy that I decided to order in my favorite foods and even food for my parents and brother since I felt so good. I ordered sushi, tteokbokki, bulgogi, fried chicken, kimchi jjigae, my favorite sparkling waters and teas, and side dishes. The food took about an hour to come but it was all worth it in the end. I couldn't stop smiling because of how happy I was. It's been a while since someone other than my family members told me that they'll protect me and care about me, so I couldn't help but show my happiness.

The only thing I remember after eating all of my food last night with my brother was doing my nighttime routine and going to bed. When I woke up, my brother told me that I was going crazy and I was singing and dancing all of the Red Velvet songs but I told him he's delusional. I did wake up in a good mood though. My parents were both home and so was my brother, but that wasn't the main reason. When I went downstairs for breakfast, my parents told us that they're going to work from home for a while since something happened at their office with their CEO and all of the staff were sent to work from home. My brother and I were excited because we usually go on road trips together. But today they needed to do some work, so I decided to go to the mall.

"That sounds fun, Miyoung." My mom smiles at me.

"Miyoung, can I come?" My brother, Mingyeom, asks and my mom shakes her head.

"You have practice at the academy remember? Knowing your sister she's going to spend all day at the mall." My mom jokes and we all laugh, basically agreeing.

"I guess you're right. Speaking of which, I have to record something before I go." Mingyeom quickly finishes his breakfast and excuses himself from the table. My parents and I finish our breakfast talking about school and other stuff.

"I'm glad you're doing so well in school, Miyoung. You deserve to go to the mall today. Buy some pretty outfits and accessories." My mom pinches my cheek and I smile.

"But don't push yourself too hard, okay? I don't want you to get overwhelmed." My dad says and I nod, finishing my food and going upstairs to get ready. I walked by my brother's room and he was recording himself singing for his academy. I smiled when he introduced himself.

"Hello, I'm Yoo Mingyeom and I will be rapping Taeyong's part in Red Velvet's "Be Natural". I chose this song because Taeyong is my idol and my sister loves Red Velvet." My brother has always been nice to me, but ever since the scandal, he's been protecting me and cherishing me. It made me think that he was scared of losing me and taking my own life. I laughed and went to the shower.

After I took a quick shower, I went to do my morning routine. Once I was done, I tried to find a cute outfit for today. I pulled out my phone and opened my closet door at the same time. I checked the weather app because I want to choose an outfit that's comfortable, works for the weather, and stylish at the same time. I'm not the type to go outside a lot, so I stood in the middle of my closet looking around for a long time. Most people would text their friends for advice, but I don't have Sungchan's number and he's basically the only friend I have. God, I can't believe Sungchan is my friend. It's been such a long time since I felt this happy and it's because I finally made a friend after years of being in Seoul and lonely.

In the end, I just looked online for inspiration. It was slightly windy today but still sunny so I wore a white long sleeve top with blue jeans and a purple tweed jacket. Since I was feeling good, I decided to wear my favorite color to brighten up my mood even more. I went to my vanity and put on a matching headband and a little bit of makeup and I was done. I grabbed my bag and filled it with everything I needed and went downstairs to get my shoes and leave. I wore white sneakers since I was going to be on my feet the whole day and I wanted to be comfortable. I said goodbye to my parents and left my house to catch the bus.

I went to my favorite mall in Seoul, the very first mall I went to when I first moved here. I remember going to the bookstore and getting a bunch of books for my room and then getting ice cream afterwards. I was happy that I was finally away from Daegu and nobody followed me here. The past is in the past and it should stay that way. In case I saw anyone from school, I wore a mask and sunglasses. The sunglasses were no problem to me since this is all I wore after my scandal happened because I didn't want anyone to see me cry. Once I arrived to the mall, I basically when crazy.

The first store I went to was a perfume shop. I don't have many perfumes because I feel like I don't need them if I don't go out and I get some from my relatives on special occasions anyways. But it's nice to treat yourself once in a while. Since I don't buy a lot of perfume, I chose a perfume mostly because of the packaging but also by the way it smelled. I like fruity scents more than flowery and I absolutely love cute packaging. I looked around the whole store and found a purple bottle of perfume. I smelled it and it was fruity so I went ahead and bought it. I also bought the lotion because of how much I liked. When I finished paying and left the store, I immediately knew where I wanted to go next.

I went up to the second floor and went inside of my favorite clothing store. When I started growing up, I ordered my clothes online to avoid human interaction as much as possible. Thankfully, this mall had the exact store I buy all of my clothes from and I was more than happy to go inside. I bought many different clothing pieces that caught my eye such as cardigans, dresses, skirts, blouses, all of them. My parents sometimes brings us out to company dinners and fancy ones with our grandparents so I always need fancy clothes. I also bought a lot of casual clothes even if I don't use them, I just thought they were cute. After I went way over my budget, I went to an accessories store.

I'm not the type to accessorize, but my feet dragged me into this store and I left with more headbands and a couple new earrings. My feet were getting tired and I haven't eaten lunch yet so I went to get a quick drink and snack at the coffee shop nearby. Instead of getting a coffee, I got a peach iced tea which reminded me of the one that Sungchan gave me. I was so surprised when he gave me peach tea because it's my favorite and I had no idea he knew. To be honest it scared me but I was more thankful than terrified. I also got a chocolate bread which also reminded me of the one Sungchan gave me. Either he guessed or he asked around, I think he guessed though because nobody in the school knows me personally, especially what I like and don't like.

When I finished eating the bread and drinking my tea, I went inside of a luxury store just to look. I don't remember the last time I went shopping — let alone anywhere — by myself, so I wanted to do whatever. The workers greeted me nicely and guided me throughout the store because I looked like I was lost and I really was. They told me about how good the bags and shoes are and were really convincing me to buy something. I already did a lot of damage to my wallet but I bought a bag anyways because this is probably the only time I'll go out in a long time. Once they packaged it really nicely for me, I left the store and pulled out my phone to text my parents and update them on how I'm doing. I didn't even notice that it was already 4pm. I heard familiar voices coming from my right and I kept my head down, thinking that they were from school.

"I haven't been to Seoul in so long! It feels nice to finally leave Daegu." I look up and see Seoryeong, Yeonjoo, and Chaesol, the three who bullied me the worst in middle school. I didn't want to make it obvious that I was here so I stayed still and pretended to look at my phone as they walked by, not even taking a glance at me. Once they were gone from my site, I ran to the nearest exit and took a taxi back home.

When I got home, my parents were in a phone meeting and greeted me silently as I quickly took my shoes off and ran to my room. My brother was at his academy doing his rap lesson so it was just my parents and I home. I immediately locked myself in my room and placed all of my bags down. I didn't hesitate to start crying. I walked over to my balcony and sat on the chair silently crying. I wanted to die in this moment. My chest was in pain and my heart was rapidly beating. I felt like I couldn't breathe and my head was spinning. I wanted to erase myself from the world, I wanted to disappear. Then I looked at the little table next to me and an unknown number was calling me. I declined the call and got a text.

Unknown
Miyoung, it's Sungchan. Are you available to talk?

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