They rarely went out as a band, but Mick suggested doing just that. Stevie was the most resistant to go, but unable to think of another excuse, she had agreed to join the rest of them in the end. All she wanted though, was to get rid of her make up and get into bed, ending up with a refreshed lip gloss and powder, leggings and a loose fitting sweater, stopping just above her knees.
She appreciated the dimly lit booth they were led to by the employee of the restaurant. Christine was enjoying a glass of wine, while the guys were drinking whiskey. After finishing a bottle of champagne by herself, Stevie decided she was going to join the men.
"Are you sure about it?"
"I'm not a baby, Lindsey."
"You don't drink as much anymore."
"We don't have a show tomorrow. I'll get horribly drunk, puke my guts out tomorrow and be as good as new for the next concert."
The other three members of the band felt the obvious tension, none of them bringing it up. It could only get worse. They learnt a long time ago, it was better to stay out of whatever Stevie and Lindsey had falled into again.
"I'm only concerned about you, Steph."
"Stevie." She said, walking to the bar for a refill. It could have been brought to her with a snap of her fingers, but she wanted at least a minute away from him.
"What happened?" Mick used the time to ask.
"We... We had a disagreement."
"When? What about?"
"In the morning. It doesn't matter, I'm sure it will pass like it does every time."
"I've been gone for sixteen bloody years and not a single thing has changed!" Christine shook her head, taking a sip of her wine. "Please, tell me you're not sleeping together? You've had to at least grown up that much."
"Us? No! God no... No way."
"You couldn't make it sound any less convincing, Lindsey."
"She's coming back." John muttered and everyone pretended to be engaged in a conversation that wasn't at all about Stevie.
She couldn't care less what was being talked about, she was too concentrated on emptying her glass. She knew Lindsey was trying to make her soften towards him, but she wasn't going to do that just yet. As nice and warm the palm of his hand felt every time he had tried to sneak it in between her legs, she pushed it away, showing him that she was still mad at him.
"When are we going to get you in that studio, Stevie?" Mick directed his attention to her and she didn't hide her annoyance.
"Aren't we on tour right now?"
"True, but once it's over, you're going to throw yourself into another project."
"What else am I supposed to do? It's not like I have a family, a husband or even a boyfriend. Nobody's keeping me occupied in other ways. Work, that's what I have left."
"But instead of the time you spent recording your solo record, you could have joined us."
"I owed that one album, Mick."
"Come on, they're not going to drop you. There will be another album, one more and then one after the last one..."
"Oh my god, will you stop?! All of you are only bitching about me lately! If I'm such a huge liability, holding you back, why don't I just quit?"
"Calm down, Steph." She felt Lindsey's hand on top of hers, but she moved away quickly.
"Don't call me that! What's not clear to you? I've asked you to stop numerous times tonight already!"
"Sorry."
"Yeah, that's all you've ever had to say." She stood up and left for some fresh air, leaving her bandmates as well as some of the other customors slightly stunned.
"Jesus fucking Christ..." Lindsey sighed, shutting his eyes for a moment. "Fourty year later, here we still are acting like fucking children." He too got up and left the table in search for his very feisty lover.
"I think I might want to leave the band again." Christine only half joked. "Has nothing really changed at all?" She saw both Mick and John shaking their heads.
Meanwhile, Lindsey couldn't find Stevie right away. He walked up and down both sides of the street, finally catching a glimpse of the golden hair at the corner of the street. He put his hand on her shoulder, making her jump a little.
"Go away."
"No."
"Lindsey, go please..." She had been crying.
"Are you honestly that upset because of what happened this morning?"
"You made me upset."
"I apologized for what I said."
"It doesn't hurt any less."
"The children part?"
"All of it! That we're in our sixties, sneaking into each other's rooms, that someone's stalking us, that you promised you'd leave your wife and forgot everything about saying it, that I can't move on from you, that I can't stop loving you, that I can't fall in love with anyone else, that I'm just a stupid fucking mess of a woman!"
"You're not a mess, Stevie. And I wish things were much easier for both of us. Don't you think I want to be with you? More than anything, Steph. But it's hard. It's really fucking hard..."
"I question it every day if you still love me."
"I do, you have to believe me."
"Why, Lindsey? What hope have you given me, besides the false one of you leaving Kristen? You always tell me that, I think I hear you say it more often than that you love me. And it's nearing twenty years, Linds... Why should I keep any of my hopes alive?"
"I'm..."
"... sorry, yeah I know." She finished the sentence for him with a heavy sigh.
She didn't fight him pulling her into his embrace. She laid her head on his chest as he rested his chin on the top of her head. Their bodies fit each other perfectly, both stood silently thinking it. He wanted to stop her heart from breaking more and more with each day, but he wasn't sure he could.
She drew back after a moment, suddenly aware of their surroundings. He grasped her chin gently and placed a soft kiss on her lips, causing a tear to roll down her face. "Let's go back inside." He took her hand and led them to the rest of the group.
Mick, John and Christine felt relieved, seeing the two coming back and holding hands. Mick was about to open his mouth, but Lindsey was quicker. "We're going to head back to the hotel."
"And to separate rooms?" Christine asked, raising her eyebrow.
"Of course."
With that they were out of the restaurant and immediately in the waiting car. Once they were driven back to the hotel, Lindsey knew they wouldn't be spending the night together. He would have been okay with at least holding her until the sun came up the next day, but she wanted to be alone and that was that. Giving her one final hug goodnight, he went to his room.
Lindsey exhaled, stopping by the door of his room. He entered, locked the door behind him and dialed the number of Stevie's suite.
"Hello?"
"I received another package."
