I can't do this

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The past two shows had been absolutely horrible in Lindsey's opinion. Stevie stayed true to her word and she didn't get anywhere near him. He didn't get to play their silly hand game during Lanslide, he wasn't holding her at a close distance, while exchanging kisses with Christine during encore, he didn't have her standing next to him for the final bow. What probably kept her going was that there was no package left for either one of them for those two days. 

The band members started gathering in the arena for the soundcheck. Stevie was unusually early, thinking that it was easier than being in the hotel, where she could stop fighting herself and rush to see Lindsey. 

She was searching for Mick, hoping to maybe find him on stage, behind his drum kit already. She stopped as soon as she noticed Lindsey, all by himself, playing the familiar intro of one of their songs. Not a Fleetwood Mac, a Buckingham Nicks one. He was playing Crystal, quietly singing to himself. She couldn't believe he remembered all the words so well to it. 

How the faces of love have changed turning the pages
And I have changed oh, but you, you remain ageless

She cocked her head up, to stop tears from falling, but it was no use. He was so beautiful, she thought to herself. She didn't need anything, only him, playing and singing with her or to her. At the same time, she wanted to strangle him. Out of all the songs they had and especially during such a painful period of time? She mentally shook herself out of her thoughts, turning around to leave, thinking of coming back only when the others were there too.

She only took a step, then bumped into Mick. "Stevie, hi! Didn't expect you to be here this early."

Lindsey looked up, thinking that she was most likely watching him. 

"I... Yes, nothing much to do at the hotel."

"Christine and John just arrived as well, we can start in a few."

She nodded and walked past him. "Stevie, wait!"

If Mick wasn't there, she wouldn't have, but it would be too suspicious if she just ignored Lindsey like that. "What is it?"

"Can we go somewhere more private?"

"Absolutely not."

"I miss you."

"You can't."

"You can't tell me you didn't miss me too."

"What do you want, Lindsey?" She asked, getting annoyed. Did he actually need to ask whether she was missing him too?

"Nothing, just... The past couple of days have been horrible."

"That's something you're going to have to get used to."

"Steph..."

"No, don't say that." She turned around again and started walking to her dressing room. "Don't follow me." He did. "I got something this morning." She used the time to tell him. 

"You mean..."

"Yeah." They reached the door and she asked him to wait outside.

"You can't be serious."

"I'm deadly serious." She entered the room and shut the door closed in his face. Lindsey stood awkwardly in the hallway, thankful nobody was passing by. "It was only this piece of paper." She gave him to look at it, after joining him again.

"Behaving yourselves?" He read it out loud, crumpling the note in his hand and sticking it in his pocket. "They're still on us." She nodded, crossing her arms. "I'm sorry."

"For what?"

"For getting you into this mess."

"Don't blame it on yourself, Lindsey. We're both equally as guilty, it's both of ours fault we can't keep our fucking hands to ourselves."

"I can't stop loving you."

"Don't sing songs like that."

The sudden change of topic surprised him. "So, you were listening then."

"I was looking for Mick and... Yeah, I was. I regret that immensely."

"Why?"

"Because it was beautiful."

"How is it bad then?"

"It broke my heart, Lindsey... What's left of it anyway." Her voice was just above a whisper. She took a deep breath and pretended to look confident. "I think we need to go to the others."

He couldn't do anything else but follow her back towards the set up stage.

~

The show seemed to have gone in slow motion, both of them wanting to get out of people's sight as quick as possible. As soon as Christine finished Songbird and they took the bow, thanked the audience and Stevie cut her speech short, she was out, Lindsey apparently left even before her.

Christine asked Stevie to go out, it was obvious to the older woman that her friend wasn't feeling very good. Right away suspecting it had something to do with Lindsey. Stevie kindly turned the offer down, going straight to her own hotel room. 

First thing she did was run herself a hot bath, light some candles and incense, that was what relaxed her the most. Besides being with Lindsey. God... Stop thinking about him, she told herself, but continued doing just that.

It might have been an hour or two, the water was cold, she didn't even realize it, she was so lost in her thoughts. She slipped into her nightie, wrapped a beautiful red silk robe around herself and got into bed, picking up her journal of course. She only got to open it, when someone decided to disturb her.

With a heavy sigh, Stevie walked to the door and opened it. Lindsey. She couldn't say anything and he simply looked at her, then began crying. He shook his head and said. "I can't do this."

~

So, what do you guys think? I'm not sure if you like this story :(

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