In Between

06

06

“Nak, gising na... Anak...” mom disturbed me from sleeping.

Nagkatalukbong ako ng kumot at niyakap ang unan. I still want to sleep, I can’t even open my eyes for a sec. I can’t remember if I have a school or some things to do, all I know is I can sleep for the whole day.

It took a few minutes before mom gave up waking me up, anong meron ngayong araw?

I thought I can now sleep in peace but I suddenly heard my door opened loudly and loud sounds that cause me to open my eyes.

“What---?!!”

“Good morning! Good morning! Good morning, Selina!!”

Pinaguuntog nila yung sandok at kaldero that made me shock. What the?! Hindi pa new year!

“Can you please stop making loud sounds!!? I’m freaking sleeping!!!” I shouted with my eyes closed.

“Walang tutulog! Walang tutulog! Walang tutulog!” I heard Tay’s voice. That Guy!

Nagtalukbong muli ako ng kumot pero hinila ito paalis. Did mom allowed them to enter my room?!

“Arghhh!”

“Gising na! Bumaba na! Kumain na! Maligo na! Magbihis na! Hihintayin ka namin sa baba!” Tay shouted in details.

“Bangon na diyan. Sayang oras kung tutulog ka lang.” He said before i heard the door closed.

What did he just said? I’m wasting my time in sleeping? Dude, he didn’t know what my comfort and peace is.

“Ingat kayo!” mom shouted to us while waving her hand.

“Bye Tita! Kami na po ang bahala sa anak ninyo!” Tay said.

Inunahan ko silang maglakad sa inis. My week is ruined. Yesterday was a disaster and I don’t think if I can still survive now. Can someone please escape me from them?

“Nakasalubong nanaman ang kilay mo!” hasik ni Taylor.

“Say star chunky cheese!” Clyde said while holding a camera.

I rolled my eyes, “San pupunta? Arcade? Amusement park?”

I suddenly asked, I don’t have any idea where we are going, but I have the thinking that it’s somewhere where they can have fun and do what they wanted to do.

Napanganga si Tay na parang hindi makapaniwala, while the others are looking at me with disbelief. They stopped walking that made me stopped too.

“What?” i raised my brow at them.

“Linggo ngayon!” Tay said.

“And... so?” I’m confused.

Why don’t they just get straight to the point?!

Tay burst a laugh that made me confused more, while the other is still shocked. Really? What is happening?

Inakbayan ako ni Tay at mas inilapit sa kanya.

“Tara.”

“Saan nga kasi tayo pupunta?” I asked.

“Somewhere at peace."

_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

A place where a huge yet old structure is standing. Crowded people yet I didn’t feel suffocate. I’m here in front of a place I didn’t know if I am supposed to be here.

“What are you feeling?” He asked.

“Unknown.”

I felt... something I didn’t know how or what to express.

“Let’s Go inside. Where you can find peace.”

Inakbayan niya ako at tinawag na ang mga alipin niya. Every steps, my heart keeps on beating faster, am I scared, nervous or... excited?

As I entered this structure I used to be ‘Home’, memories flashed in my mind that I already throw at my back. Why our past and tragic memory does keeps on flashing in our mind? How can be a past keeps on disturbing me every day if it’s already done? Is it a Nightmare?

As I continuously walked slowly, a scene that I wanted yet painful scene played in my head. A little girl, wearing a cute white dress while holding a basket full of flowers, smiling widely as if she’s the most happiest in the world.

Those smile.

Those little cutie dimples.

Those flowers I used to admire.

Those eyes I wished I was blind.

She’s clueless, she didn’t know that it would be the last time she would wear those smiles.

I’m here, exactly in that place where that girl is the most precious in their eyes, not until now.

“Okay ka lang, Selina?”

My sense came back when Aljon asked me. Napatingin ako’t unti unting tumango.

“Oo.” I whispered.

I breathe heavily, suddenly my mind occupied to the point I forgot how to properly breathe. My hand were shaking, I was about to put my hands inside my pocket hoodie when Tay hold it... tightly.

“Kalma. Just... focus in the present.” He whispered and then an old man came in front.

Huminga ako ng malalim, I tried myself to focus.

“Let’s all pray. Let’s bow our Head, Close your eyes and feel the presence of the Lord... In the name of the Father, and on the Son, and on the Holy Spirit. Lord God...”

I did what the pastor said. I don’t have any doubt, I can’t feel any nervous and I’m not afraid... I just... focused in the present.

It’s about a decade, since I did this. I don’t know if I already forgot how to pray because I used it to be my routine... But I won’t know if I won’t try. I just whispered everything that popped in my head, until the pastor stopped and I stopped too. I signed of the cross after.

I’m about to open my eyes when someone wipe it with towel.

“You may now sit down.” He announced so we sat down.

I looked away. I felt embarrassing! I cried!

He chuckled when he saw my reaction. Mabuti’t hindi napansin ng ibang kasama namin o masyado lang silang nakafocus?

“It’s okay to cry, sometimes we need to let out the words we wanted to say not only in writing...” I immediately looked at him, he’s smiling. “...But also in crying.”

I stared at his eyes, wondering when I would see those eyes tearing. I was shocked on how he spoke those words easily, can he give me some tips?

Pastor asked for a testimony, i think it’s only five people who raised their hands.

They all testimony... out loud. I was amazed by how they spoke their words, I can feel their emotions and feelings, I can see in their eyes that their happy to do it. Some are even crying because of overwhelmed. Some are even dancing and singing alone in front of us for the Lord.

They are free to do whatever they want just to share the goodness of the Lord in their Life.

I focused, I didn’t know I would listen to their stories. I used to read, not to listen to stories, but I prefer both now.

It took almost an hour to finish and then the Pastor asked everybody to get their Bible.

Everyone took their bible, I don’t have any because I didn’t we would went here, but still I don’t have any bible to bring---

“Here.”

Okay. He planned it.

“Sa Proverbs 17:3”

I get the Bible on Tay’s hand and open it in Proverbs. I missed holding this book I used to be my favorite.

"Gold and silver are tested by Fire, and a person's heart is tested by the Lord... Amen." he said out loud. The verse is good.

It’s been a long ago since I heard a Bible Verse.

“Ang mundo ay parang isang... Laro.” He looked at us, his voice are loud and boldly.

“Laro! Maraming Level. Maraming hakbang. At sa bawat Level na yun ay may pagsubok... Sa larong yon, Tayo ang character, ang gumagalaw...Madali sa una kaya’t nagmadali kang tapusin para makuha ang award mo. Pero habang pahakbang ka ng pahakbang ng level ay pahirap ng pahirap ang pagsubok.” He stopped for a while.

I’m getting amazed on his speech.

“Siguro ay nagtataka kayo kung bakit ko inihahalintulad ang Laro sa ating Buhay, ano?” napatawa siya. “Hindi ko sinasabing Laro lamang ang ating Buhay, Ang buhay kasi natin ay higit pa sa isang Laro.”

“Tayo ang character, level ang ating edad, pagsubok ang ating kalaban, at hindi ba kayo nagtataka na mayroon dapat kumokontrol sa atin?”

No one dared to answer. Silence.

“Sa Laro, mayroong character at tayo iyon. Sa Laro, mayroong manlalaro. Si God dapat iyon... pero binigyan niya kasi tayo ng freewill.” He whispered the last sentence.

“Freewill na gumalaw sa ayon natin. Alam niyo ba kung bakit tayo may Freewill?... Kasi para malaman niya kung sino ang anak niya. Maraming may sumuko. Maraming lumiko ng landas sa hirap. Maraming naligaw. Maraming hindi nagtiwala kay Lord. At iilan lang ang nagtagumpay at iyon ang tunay na anak ng Diyos.”

Maraming naligaw.

“God is in control. Siya ang gumawa ng laro, kaya alam niya kung ano ang pagsubok na kakaharapin natin sa susunod na level. He knows everything. You just need to be faithful and keep on fighting.”

Keep on fighting.

“It’s never been too late, kapatid. He’s waiting for your turn.”

God knows me very well.

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Written By:Heyiyz_Heart24