Bare (Royal Society #2) COMPLETED

Chapter Nineteen

Chapter Nineteen

Stripped-down Identity

I took a step away from him.

Away from the pain.

Away from betrayal.

Away from regret.

My father... the person I don't longed for but the person I know I wanted to be with. Kahit sa isang saglit lang, maramdaman ko na mayroon akong ama. Because all my life, I've been jealous because they have their father whom they can call as their own.

While I have a father... but he isn't my real father. He acted like my father when he doesn't need to. He acted like one despite my lack of response whenever he asks about my day. He acted close to me just because he saw grew up.

Those thoughts made me still.

With wide eyes, I look at Dusk. I carefully examined his face and tried to prove myself wrong. But I wasn't. In his face, traces of our father can be seen. From his chinky eyes, pointed nose, and ocean-like color of eyes. It was there, how could I miss it?

I gasped and covered my mouth in realization. "I-It's... King Stefan... "h-how could such thing happen?" I asked habang paulit-ulit na umiiling.

"Tell me! He has a Queen! It never changed ever since their coronation, so how come..."

"Listen to me carefully, Dawn," Mama said as she laid me down in bed.

 She brushed my hair with her fingers while slowly tapping my arms to make me sleep. "Mama will tell you a story, okay?" I nodded with enthusiasm despite the feeling of comfort brought by her fingers in my hair.

"Once upon a time, there was girl... unlike any other girls, she was the lowly one. No title at all, just a mere servant inside that big castle."

"Every time it is time for reassignments, she was silently hoping not to be placed with the King's attendants because she doesn't like strict aura of the King. But then... fate is playing on her."

I looked up to Mama and asked, "she was assigned to the awful King?"

Mama smiled and pinched my cheeks. "Such a smart girl."

"Yes, she was assigned as the chamber cleaner of the King. She agreed. Looking the bright side, King won't always be there, she thought."

"Oh how wrong she is, because when the King noticed her from her first appearance in his chamber, he never did his works in his office ever again."

Mama stopped so I argued her to continue. "The girl then finally snapped because she can't take the King's annoying grins and smirks every time their eyes met. She asked him, why are you staying in here, Sire? You should be in your office, not here!"

"But instead of punishing her for being disrespectful to the him, he laughed and replied, what does it have to do with you?"

"The girl then was stunned but not because of the question rather because the King laughed... she never once heard the King's laughter since she can remember and hearing him laugh made an impact on her."

"It warmed her heart, seeing the King happy... and that became the mission of the lowly girl, Dawn - to make the King happy," Mama said and kissed my forehead.

With tears streaming down on my face, I once again looked at my Mama and said, "it was you... the lowly girl you told me when I was a child, it was you."

"Dawn, anak," Mama said, walking up to me. "You're right, it's me. I was the lowly girl who wanted nothing but to hear the King's laughter."

"Mama, why... why did you let yourself be in that position?"

She looked away and sighed. "I'm not sure. Why did I let myself be in that position?" She wondered and smiled right after. "Maybe because his happiness radiates my day. It completes the puzzle in me. It became my home."

Then she faced me. "That's why you should not hate your father, Dawn. He did every thing he could to be your father in that short period of time. He did not fail to be one, right? Because with his guidance, you both grew up in the right path."

"Then what about you, huh?" I snapped. "You are giving him credits but how about you, Mama? You are the one who raised us without any company. You are the one who suffered the most. You are the one who received the most criticism."

"Dawn, stop," pigil sakin ni Dusk but I ignored him.

"Why? He abandoned us and Mama kept on crediting him just because he was there as we grow up. But he didn't acknowledge the fact that he committed a mistake against the Queen. Because he is married, he should not have let his feelings overpower his rational mind."

Tumingin ako kay Mama para makahingi ng sagot pero tahimik lang siya. It was then I realized that Mama wanted it. She loved him that's why she accepted her place as his mistress. She didn't ask for more and just kept her place as our mother.

"Because I stopped him, Dawn," mahinang sabi ni Mama. She looked at me. "He wanted to protest to the Upper Clan to make me as his first wife, next to the Queen. But I didn't want to. How can a lowly person like me dream of a position like that? People will protest, scholars will surely be against it, and his people will lose trust in him."

"I don't want that for him, Dawn. It will be a mess and I can't afford to see him being disgraced by officials because of me."

She sighed. "Seeing him from afar is enough for me. Seeing him take care of both of you is more than enough. But seeing him living happily is beyond enough."

"How... how can you be so selfless, Mama?"

Ngumiti siya sa akin at hindi nagsalita. But I am like Mama. No matter how much I deny the truth, I am her replica when it comes to attitudes. 

That's why I decided to keep the truth from them from the start because this is my battle, and I don't want them to involved in my mess. Kahit na si King Stefan pa ang aking ama, hindi magbabago ang desisyon ko. 

I just uncovered my identity but that will not waver my decision.

"But, Mama..." I started and smiled at her, to ease her feelings. "I... I will still leave."

"W-what?"

"I will leave the Palace, Mama."

***