150 Things Portgas D. Ace is NOT allowed to do

Rules #1-15

There

Right there on the mast of Adam's Oak wood was the first list. Maybe Ace shouldn't have pissed off his division subordinates...or the nurses...or shipwright, or cooks, or blacksmiths...Or anyone for that matter.

The following rules apply to Second Division commander "Fire Fist" Portgas D. Ace. There are to be no exceptions. Please realize that breaking a rule will result in harsh punishments from your own division, as well as any other involved divisions.

Well, two could play at that game. He'd start a damn message board on the rule sheet.

1.) Do NOT hide "Macy" from Rakuyo no matter how funny he looks searching for her. He has serious abandonment issues.

Ace: Awe, come on. That was FUNNY.

Rakuyo: It was NOT! I looked all over for my Macy! From stern to bow, from starboard to port! I even ventured into Izou's room! I saw and endured horrible, horrible things Ace!

Ace: It couldn't have been that bad in Izou's room...

Izou: Oh no, I tormented him all right. Warning to all: Don't interrupt my beauty routines.

Rakuyo: *Whimpers* I refuse to let my Macy out of my sight now.

2.) DON'T use your powers on something just to "see what would happen".

Ace: In my defense, it was for science.

Marco: You tried to set fire to a combination of Izou's and Curiel's experimental gun powder, yoi.

Ace: ...Science?

3.) STOP wasting bandages from the infirmary to "become a mummy". Curiel is already stressed enough as it is. He doesn't need to run around like a headless chicken looking for missing supplies.

Ace: I think that headless chicken reference would work better for Marco.

Marco: Enjoy the extra paperwork in your room Ace. I told the other commanders you would handle theirs.

Ace: Oh, Gods damn it.

4.) STOP wasting toilet paper by doing this. Seriously, we need it Ace.

Ace: It wasn't that much guys, come on.

Namur: You wasted 15 rolls, Ace...

Ace: ...

5.) Just DON'T waste any supplies to become to be a mummy.

Ace: Now what am I supposed to do for Halloween?!

Izou: Geisha?

Haruta: Match?

Curiel: Watermelon?

Vista: Magician?

Thatch : Stripper?

Izou: Thatch?!

Thatch: What?

Ace: Going with Thatch's idea!

Marco: Now look what you've done, yoi.

Thatch: Sorry, not sorry!

6.) STOP accusing Marco of filicide when you see him eating an omelette, or any other egg related dish, for breakfast.

Ace: But he is!

Marco: I don't even lay eggs! I'm a man last I checked.

Ace: That's what they all say.

7.) DON'T accuse Marco of cannibalism either when you see him eating chicken or turkey.

Ace: Marco's a bird. Chicken and turkey are birds. Seems like cannibalism to me.

8.) You also CAN'T accuse Namur of cannibalism, he is a shark fishman. Of course they eat fish and meat, Ace.

Ace: It's not my fault I'm surrounded by cannibals!

Namur: We. Are. Not. Cannibals!

9.) STOP falling asleep during a meeting and blaming it on your narcolepsy.

Ace: *insert crude drawing of angry face*

10.) STOP falsely blaming anything on your narcolepsy.

Ace: Sometimes it actually is my narcolepsy though!

Jozu: Even when you fell asleep during a supply run last time we stopped at an island?

Ace: ...Yes...?

11.) DO NOT push the "big, shiny red button" in Marine bases ever again.

Ace: How was I supposed to know it was an alarm?!

Marco: It had the word 'ALARM' on it!

Ace: Your point?

12.) You can NOT "have a mutiny" because you're bored again. Even despite how amused Pop's is.

Ace: But it gets so booooorrrrriiiing sometimes. Mutiny's aren't boring!

Pops: I've got agree with ace there brats. They're quite amusing.

Ace: Yay! Pops joined in on our message board of "things Ace is totally allowed to do"!

Izou: That's not what this is!

Pops: Gurararara.

13.) The saying "it is better to ask for forgiveness than to get permission" does not apply to you in any way, shape, or form.

Ace: But you guys forgive me, right?

Ace: Right?

Ace: Guys?

Ace: Please?

14.) Whenever you do do #13, you better damn well ask for forgiveness.

Ace: Guys? Come on.

15.) You will end the prank war between your division and the fourth division.

Ace: But I'm winning!

Thatch: Like hell you are!

Izou: Which one of you needed some make up?

Blenheim: Even I know this isn't going to make them stop.

Haruta: I can't believe I'm saying this, but the war has gone too far. STOP ENABLING THIS IZOU!

Pops: Gurararara

Haruta: YOU TOO POPS!