Why do I love you? - Minsung

[50]

It's been a week since the last time I saw Han.

After that day at Jeongin's home, I lost contact with him.

The next day, he told me that he still had a big assignment, so he would be very busy and wouldn't be able to talk to me or even hang out.

It was so strange for me because he kept seeing my friends and Hyunjin. The only person he didn't have time to hang out with was me...?

Chan and Changbin told me that they saw Han during the week and that he didn't look so good. That something was happening to him, but he never dared to tell them anything when both asked the younger if something was wrong.

My friend Chan asked me if I knew anything about it, but I told him that no, that I didn't notice anything wrong with Han.

I never mentioned that it's been a week since the last time I had contact with Han. I didn't want to worry my friend. So I lied to Chan.

I couldn't sleep the next day after knowing this. I knew that I had to do something about it.

So I tried to call Han several times, but he never replied nor called me back. He completely disappeared from my life in just one week.

Why Han has been seeing his friends but not me? Why would he not respond to my calls or texts? Is he mad at me?

All night have been these thoughts roaming in my head, killing me little by little.

I locked my phone. I stopped calling him when I realized that it was too late.

"I know that something is happening. Tomorrow I'll figure out," I said to myself before going to sleep.

~~~

So today, I came to Han's apartment without telling him.

I've been knocking on the door since fifteen minutes ago, but he is not responding.

Fortunately, I remembered his passcode. He gave it to me one of the times we did a sleepover at his place.

Should I enter without his permission? What if he gets mad?

I was debating with myself for about fifteen more minutes, but soon after, I found myself pressing the buttons on the door.

I entered.

The lights are turned on but there's silence in the place.

Everything looks normal and neat.

His laptop and a notebook from school are placed on the little table in the middle of the living room, and even his phone.

But Han is not here.

When I was about to go to the kitchen, I heard how hard a thing fell in the distance. By this, I knew Han was in his bedroom since the sound came from there.

"Han-ah..." I said aloud in order for him to notice I am inside his house.

But no one responded.

"Han-ah, are you there?" I knocked on the door of his room, but still, there was no response.

So I opted to open it.

I was so nervous, but I did it either way.

When I opened the door, I saw Han sitting on the edge of the window, peering outside absent-minded.

He was hugging a pillow, and a book was on the floor next to him, the one I heard just a moment ago.

I assume that it felt without him noticing.