How Dare You [ReidxReader]

(5) Payback

"Go back?" he thought. "No good at all! Go sideways? Impossible! Go forward? Only thing to do! On we go!" So up he got.
― J.R.R. Tolkien, The Hobbit, or There and Back Again

"Hi, I need to pick up Suboxone for a friend." You smile at the pharmacist. "But I forgot the prescription. Could I still get it now? I will pay for it."

The pharmacist eyes you up and down and you try to look as sweet as honey. "How many pills are supposed to be in the bottle?"

"Forty-Five."

The pharmacist raises his eyebrow: "That will be 300$." You nod: "That's alright."

He shrugs his shoulders and goes to get it. You pay in cash and quickly leave.

Spencer is sitting in your car, waiting for you. You let out a relieved sigh and hand Spencer the pills: "That will be enough for a month. Hopefully, you'll be good after that."

He stares at the bottle of pills and back at you: "How much did they cost?"

You start the car: "Don't worry about it."

"No." He objects. "I want to pay you back."

You pull out the lot and tell him: "You will pay me back by getting clean."

It's Sunday evening and you haven't let Spencer alone longer than ten minutes since Friday. The ten minutes were you showering. And maybe some bathroom breaks.

You look at the road and drive quietly back to your apartment. Suddenly, Spencer asks: "Why are you so nice to me?" At the next red light, you turn your head to meet his eyes: "Why shouldn't I?"

He fumbles with the bottle: "Because I was an ass." You let out a laugh: "Yeah, you were." After a pause you answer his question: "I saw you struggling, and I saw no one else looking after you. By then the rest of the team pissed me off more than you did."

"They look after me." Spencer's voice gets louder. You squint you eyes: "They have been profilers and you coworkers for what? Five years? And they didn't realize what's been going on with you. It took me like two weeks." He doesn't answer you.

"Look, I understand that you want to defend them. They are your friends, your family, but they..." You sigh. You don't want to drag them through the dirt. They still make you angry, however. Spencer stays quiet.

Parking the car, you say: "This whole ordeal simply reminds me of what I went through, and no one looked after me. I just want to... I don't know." You rub your hands over your face.

Taking a deep breath, Spencer puts his hand on your shoulder and waits until you look at him. "Thank you." He whispers.

- - - - - - - - - -

It's weird how two days and nights together created such an intimacy between the two of you. Maybe its Spencer throwing up in your bathroom until four a.m., maybe its you two sleeping in the same room.

He still gets goosebumps, stomachache and suddenly starts sweating, but the worst seems to be over. When Spencer wants to help you change the bedsheets, you order him to sit down until you're done. Reluctantly, he does as you say and waits until you put everything in the washing machine and tell him to get back to bed.

In sweatpants and a t-shirt, you go to sit in bed next to him. Apparently, this is the first time he is calm enough to look at your exposed arms. He sees the scarred track marks. You feel him staring at them before you even turn your head to confirm he doses. As if Spencer were entranced, he lifts his hand to touch them.