The Secrets We Keep [Spencer Reid x Reader 18+] || ✔️

Rough Cases

I'll never fully understand what compels human beings to senselessly murder. Of course, I get the jest of it. That's my job anyway. But, as I'm standing here, staring at these families who were slaughtered, blood staining the floors and walls, I feel sick. Nor can I figure out the 'why'.

We've been here for three days. We have a geographical profile down and we know he's a male, but we aren't any closer to catching him. He killed twice over a period of 12 hours and now, he's a dormmate. I want to fucking scream as we ride the cusp of this case going cold.

I've debated calling y/n and allowing her to help, but Emily specifically requested she not be involved so she could rest. I sipped my coffee as I went over the facts of this case, trying to figure out if we missed anything.

"You okay, Spence?" JJ questioned. I lifted my eyes to meet hers, nodding before voicing my reassurance.

"Yeah. I'm fine. I just want to solve this and get home." She nodded, understanding what I was saying without me voicing it specifically. "I hate leaving her alone. We all know what happened last time."

She nodded once more, "call her. Give yourself some peace of mind. It can't hurt. I'll come get you if we have a breakthrough."

I bolted from the room, leaving the files open as I pulled my phone from my pocket. It was 9 am there and she hasn't texted me yet, but I didn't care. I needed to hear her voice.

She answered after three and a half rings. Her voice groggy and filled with sleep, "Spence? Everything okay?" She asked. A smile crept up my face at how much she cared.

"Yes babe, everything is great. I just missed you. I just-" I sighed, "I just really needed to hear your voice."

I heard her giggle through the phone, "Spencer fucking Reid, the world's sappiest sap." I rolled my eyes, though she couldn't see it.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know you love it." That was all I could manage to say as the sadness flooded my brain. I missed her and her warmth. I missed her smile, her voice, her kisses, and the way she whines and stomps around the house.

"That's why I'm going to marry the shit out of you." She yelled at me. That's another thing. She literally yells when she's excited. I swear I'll be deaf before everyone else because she's so loud. Always. Sometimes I thrive on it, like in the bedroom, but not over the phone.

I put the phone back to my ear, the ringing piercing my brain, "shhhhh. You're gonna blow my eardrum, baby."

I heard her sigh on the other end of the line. It was sad and I knew she needed this call as much as I did. "What's the matter, baby?" I pushed.

"I feel so useless being here all alone. I miss working so much. And I miss you. And I am afraid of the nights because you aren't here. And my mom won't stop calling me. I feel so alone, Spence and I-"

"Fluff? Breath hunny. Breath." I cut her off knowing she would continue as I so often do. My heart squeezed at her admission. She felt useless and alone, the two things I knew well. Also, two things I never wanted her to feel. I looked back to our co-workers, making sure they were occupied before I made her feel useful.

"Well, if you want to feel useful, maybe you can help me?" I heard shuffling on the other end of the phone, then padding of her feet running to god knows where. She wasn't very quiet in the feet department.

"I'm ready!" She squealed at me.

I turned away from our co-workers as I gave her the facts of the case. "Two families murdered. Seems to be a family annihilator. We know it's a male, but we don't know much else. It seems mom and dad were killed first. Dad was brutalized more than mom. And the brother was brutalized more than the sisters." I could hear her writing as I spoke 'mhm'ing me as she wrote.

I continued "He hasn't struck and there's no overlap in the families. Absolutely nothing."

She hummed in acknowledgment before asking, "sexual assault?"

"None."

"Toxicology reports?" Then it dawned on me. We didn't get any. None. And I told her as much. "You need to get those. Have Garcia look to see if the ME ever had any contact with the families. Those damn ME's are always out here being sneaky." She giggled slightly.

"You're amazing babe. I'll call you tonight. I love you so much." I hung up the phone, practically skipping back to the team.

"We never got toxicology reports. Never. Someone call Garcia and see if there is overlap between the ME and these families." Emily shot me a look and I just glanced away/

"Reid. Come here." She stomped off and I hesitantly followed behind her. All eyes on me as I tried to look as innocent as Y/N did last night. "You told her didn't you?" When I didn't answer she asked again, more stern this time, "Didn't you, Reid?"

I nodded, "We were getting nowhere, Em. We've been here for days and normally we'd be on our way home. She told me she felt useless. Now look, we may have a break. You cant be mad at me for asking for her help. She is a part of the team." I held her gaze. Her eyes softened.

"I understand but next time talk to me?" She patted my shoulder before walking back into the room.

...

We arrested the unsub that night. Y/N broke the case wide open and the ME was arrested. He had gone on dates with the mothers years prior and after his wife died, he snapped. He surrendered easier than any of us expected. But all it meant was I got to go home. Home to the beautiful woman I knew would be waiting for me.

I sat with a book in my lap, but I could barely keep focus on the words in front of me. Her memory flashing through my mind like a movie. I was pulled out of my thoughts by Morgan calling me from across the aisle.

"Pretty boy? You okay? You have yet to turn a page." He let out a small laugh at my lack of page-turning. I waved him off as I turned a page.

"Happy?" I asked sarcastically. But good old Morgan not letting me get away with it.

He shook his head, rolling his eyes at me, "you know what I mean. What's going on in the big brain of yours?"

I shrugged. Not like I can say, oh ya know, just thinking about railing my fiancé whos patiently waiting for me in our apartment. Ya know. I didn't think anyone else on the jet would appreciate that confession.

So I settled for the typical, "I just can't wait to get home. This case was rough." It was partly true. I needed my mind wiped of all the bullshit caused for us. And she was the only one who could make me forget.

I decided to shoot her a text, letting her know exactly what to expect. Or, more specifically, what I expect from her.

To FLUFF: If you aren't knelt by the front door, bare naked, in the position I like, so help you god that I don't even believe in.

I pressed send, swallowing down the smirk that threatened my lips. I put my phone on the table in front of me as I waited for a reply. I went back to my book, flipping pages to cover the intrusive thoughts I had. It wasn't working, to say the least.