therapy / c.hood a.u. [ON HOLD]

five;

letting calum stay the night was one of the worst decisions i could've made. i woke up with him beside me and now i have to pee but he's wrapped around me, like a koala.

that's not the only reason i regret it. i was just thinking and i realized that i've never actually been this close to someone. i've never even opened up to anyone besides my brother.

it really sucks too, because i was starting to like calum a little. but i can't let him het close to me, i could hurt him. he could hurt me. i don't like either of those.

"oh, you're awake." i state when i look down at his face.

"hi." he breathes out before fully opening his eyes. "oh, shit i'm sorry." his eyes widen and he immediately let's go of me.

"um, it's ok." i bite my lip. "i really have to pee..." i whisper and he chuckles.

i jump out of my bed and exit my room to the bathroom. i pass ashton on the way and he stops me in my tracks.

"hey.." he cautiously says."is calum still here? i need to talk to him." he tells me.

"check my room." i state and walk past him into the bathroom.

after i've used the toilet and washed my hands, i pull my hair back and wash my face. i dry my face and hands before brushing me teeth and leaving the bathroom.

as i walk back to my room i hear voices coming from inside so i press my ear against the closed door and listen closely.

"she isn't crazy man. she just has some issues." i hear calum say.

"she slashed my fucking tires cal, all i did was make her mad for accidentally eating her lucky charms." ashton tells him.

it wasn't about the lucky charms, it was about the fact that he lied and said he didn't eat them when i first asked.

"i would slash your tires too. food is food." calum laughs.

"shut the fuck up. this is serious. i really like nora, but i don't know how well i can settle with jessica. she makes me nervous when i'm around her, and not in a good way." ashton admits.

i can feel my blood boiling.

not able to listen anymore, i grab his phone from the plug in the kitchen and swing the door open. i clench my fists. ashton turns to look at me and immediately his jaw drops.

i walk towards him and flaunt his phone in front of his face. before i have time to calm down and let myself think, i throw his phone at the wall and it shatters.

calum jumps up.

"jess!" he shouts.

ashton covers his mouth with his hands. my mom comes rushing in.

"what the hell happened?" she asks out of breath, walking over to me.

"i-i don't know. i got mad." i tell her. i suddenly taste blood in my mouth and realize i had been biting my cheek too hard.

"jessica, what did you do!" she shouts.

"nora, it's fine." ashton closes his eyes and sighs heavily.

my mom sees his broken phone and shakes her head.

"i'm so sorry ashton." she frowns and leans in closer to me. "she's not usually like this." she says sternly.

"it's fine, really." he says again.

calum just looks at me with an expression i can't decipher.

"i'll buy you a new phone." my mom tells him.

"don't worry about it. i needed to buy a new one anyways." he looks directly at me before leaving my room.

my mom doesn't even think twice before colliding her hand with my face. i wince in pain. calum steps between us and turns to face me.

"are you ok?" he asks. i nod.

"don't pity her, she deserved that." my mom spits.

"i don't care if she fucking deserved it or not. that was assault and i can fucking report you for harming your own daughter." calum says in a low voice that i've never heard.

she doesn't say anything. she just gives me and angry look and storms out of my room.

"are you ok?" calum asks again.

"yes, i'm fine. she's right. don't pity me, i deserved it. just leave before i start breaking things." i look at the floor.

"i don't want to leave. i want to make sure that you-"

"calum, i said leave!" i shout.

he frowns. i don't care. he just nods and slowly walks towards my door.

he turns to face me and opens his mouth but nothing comes out. he turns back around, continuing his exit. he shuts my door and immediately grab the lamp from my nightstand and throw it.

i continue to damage things until i'm left crying on the floor, rocking back and forth.

i shouldn't even get mad when people call me crazy, because i am. but i do. i get mad and that's what makes me crazy.

i should be locked up. far away from everyone. i just keep ruining things and hurting innocent people.

i can't even have friends because i'm psychotic. it will always be that way. there is no cure. i'm just a failed experiment.

a/n:

sort of just a filler but hEEEY !!!

so like while i wrote this i felt horrible because poor ashy just keeps getting his shit ruined. and i rllly hope you liked it tho.

i'm trying to rush without going too too fast bc i want to get to the good stuff but in order to do that i need to do this annoying filler crap and i'm sorry if it sucks but bare with me pls.

also follow me on twitter for relatable teen tweets @ acidicxh00d

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