Born Without A Heart

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No I wasn't born without a heart , I wasn't always like this . Watched you brake me , now you blame me... No , I wasn't born with all this flaws and thats what made me like this.

Can you blame me? 

That's the way I am such a bitter pill..

It took me more than half of my teenage years to understand it was not my fault for all I went through. Because of what I saw and experienced in my teenage, I became  stronger, probably hard, and cold-hearted. I became skeptical and less trusting. It took my faith  away from good things in life and made me overly crude and realistic. I grew up to be closed and misunderstood . I stopped looking for positive  in people. And suffered from anxiety , anger , self heatred and low self asteem. 

I believe , I am lucky enough to even have a will to survive . I am not really sure what kind of person I'll become , but I;m sure what i don't want to be. I have learned the value of kindness , grattitude  and life.

As I was laying in bed writting this letter to myself an old quote came up to my mind....

"Scars remind us where we've been. They don't  have to dictate where we are going "

Now as I cry tears of gold I am learning  to let go and live my life..

As I should be-Calm

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