Not So Innocent ~Spencer Reid~

Chapter 19

You fall asleep, knowing this will be the last time you do so with Spencer, the man you love. He's been asleep for a while now, but finally you join him in the slumber. Your heart breaks at the sight of his sad face when you say goodbye in your dreams.

They say love is pain, well darling let's hurt tonight.

You finally stir up, seeing Spencer slipping on his black and white shoes. He's dressed in work clothes. There must be a case.

You fight to keep your eyes open, but it's difficult. He leaves the room softly, not wanting to wake you up. After a minute, your brain finally wakes up and you run to the kitchen where Spencer is.

You wrap your arms around him before he can open the door. He returns the hug, chuckling and asking what was wrong.

"I'm just going to miss you." You sigh into his chest.

"I probably won't be gone long."

You nod your head, still on his chest. "I love you." You didn't really mean to say it. It just came out. Like a truth bomb after someone takes a serum in those weird movies.

He seems taken aback. "I love you too."

Spencer said it back. He had to have meant it because you don't think he'd say something he didn't mean. Oh no. This really has gone too far. Shit.

You look up at him, still in the hug. He grabs your face and plants a kiss on your lips. "I've got to go," Spencer says with a frown.

You nod your head again, releasing him. He leaves out of the apartment door, and you sigh. Don't cry don't cry don't cry.

You lean with your back against the door, hands rubbing your temples. Shit. You really don't want to f*cking hurt him, but you know leaving will hurt too. None of the outcomes of this situation end well. Either you leave, and you both lose the one you love, or you stay and lie to him every single day. Every option ends with both of you getting hurt. And it's all your fault.

Your phone rings around eleven AM. "What do you want now, Aiden?"

"Hello, kiddo."

Holy effing shit. It's not Aiden...

"Pops?" You swallow.

"Yes it's me. I'm calling you from prison," his tone is sarcastically calm.

The trial must've passed, and you didn't hear about it because you hadn't asked Spencer anything important.

"I..."

"Save it. You didn't do your job. You know how that ends. I will get my guys to track you down, and you and whoever the hell you're staying with will pay."

"I'm not staying with anybody."

"Oh please. I know you can't be by yourself. You may think your so tough, but you're really just a big baby. Does this person know you're a murderer?"

"You made me."

"That doesn't make you innocent, baby girl."

You hang up, throwing your phone on the ground. It cracks a bit, but you couldn't give any less shits. Tears burn at your eyes. You have to leave soon. If they find you now, they'll find Spencer. Yes, he's an FBI agent and can fend for himself and has a team, but you can't put him in danger. That'd make you even worse of a person if possible.

You hop into the shower, trying to calm the tears running down your face. Instead, the salty tears mix with the water. You yell, pounding your fist against the shower wall.

You change into jeans, boots, and a sweater and pack everything back into your bag. Your knife is put into your boots.

You rip a piece of paper out of a journal of Spencer's and grab a pen. You begin writing.

When you're done, you sit on his bed. Your head rests in your hands. You've just ruined a perfectly good man's life.

You walk out of Spencer Reid's bed room, everything with you and ready to leave. Your not so brilliant plan is to take a bunch of urbers until you get far enough away. Then you can find your way to another state and start a new life, alone.

The door bursts open several feet in front of you. You drop the handle of your suitcase.

"Y/n Y/l/n, you are under arrest for the murders of 23 people."

An attractive dark headed agent you've seen before handcuffs your hands behind your back. She makes them tight.

You cooperate, letting her push you toward the door.

"So you're not even going to defend yourself," Spencer comes into the apartment, facing directly at you.

"Spencer," you breathe.

"Why the hell would you bring me into this? If you're going to be criminal, don't fucking flirt with a federal agent."

"I'm so..."

"Your first mistake was thinking I wouldn't eventually figure it out. My stupid mistake was not figuring it out soon enough. You're a really good fuckin' liar." His face is angry and sad mixed in one.

"I didn't want you find out this way," your eyes burn again.

"So what? You pretend you love me, then you were going to leave?"

"I needed to leave to protect you, and I wasn't pretending."

"I have a hard time believing that's true."

"I'm so sorry, Spencer."

"Get her out of here."

Tears stream down your face as he won't even look at you while you're being taken out of the apartment. You're pushed into the back of a car and driven to the interrogation room. Flashbacks begin to swim in your mind of the last time you were in one of these rooms.

You admit to everything you've done, barely giving an explanation as to why. You were a killer, there's no use in telling them you couldn't get out of it. It's not like they'd believe you anyway. You tell them what you did for the gang, they listened in shock.

"How'd you get into a gang like that?"

"It was either that or be an orphan."

"Why Spencer?" the pretty blonde agent asks. She stops leaning on the wall and crosses her arms.

"He was kind, and I needed someone like him. I didn't realize what I was doing. I mean I did, but," you shake your head, "it wasn't supposed to end like that. How is he?"

"I don't think you have a right to ask that."

You nod your head as another tear rolls down your face.

Where there is love, there is pain.

1088 words! almost done🥺🤺