8:05 P.M. 9-26-2020

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So I failed. Hard. Every scenario was flawed. I couldn't get a single plan right. There was always a hole. And I am running out of ideas. But mainly, I am running out of time. I failed to find a way to be invited willingly by the residents. And now I am doubting I will ever find a better idea.
Well, I was left with no other choice. Breaking in. I should think of a plot then.
After one hour of brainstorming, I was set. I can say I have a plan. First, I need a new SIM card. An untraceable one.
After attaining the card, I headed to Hazel's building. I found the right janitor for the job. I tipped him and he tipped me back. He told me that the head of security's wife was at the hospital, expecting to be in labor at any moment. And that usually no one enters his unit but him because, I believe he slipped unintentionally when he said this, to protect the building security and privacy. So that unit was something. Big time. Now my plan was becoming clearer.
I had to tip him with what's worth his salary for six month to give me the personal number of the head of security and to tell me where I might find his spare key. I then thanked him gratefully and wished him a safe trip home. And then I told him that he should forget what just happened. And that if he mentioned seeing me even by mere accident, I will slaughter his kids. But then, with a startled look, he said he has no kids. Then I said I will wait till he does. And I waved goodbye.
When did I become such a psycho? Huh, I don't know. Let's say that was just an act.
I went back to my car. I kept telling myself that there may be another way. And that I don't have to butt in and get myself in trouble. I mean, after all, if I get arrested, no one can save Hazel. Maybe I should call Detective Danes and tell him all. And ask him to help me. He will understand, there may be a human behind all these formalities. But then there's the risk of the captors finding out and harming my hazel, or, even worse, he might not believe. Thinking about it now, he would definitely not believe me. I am a man accused of madness and violent tantrums, claiming that there's a treacherous organization behind the kidnapping of my fiancée, who I came to not know her name, without a single proof. The authorities will never believe me and will call it a "conspiracy theory" that I am using to cover up for killing Hazel or whatsoever. If they even admit she exists. Telling the cops will only cease any hope of getting her back. But if I start this, there's no going back either. The overthinking proves useless, and my only plan sinks in. Time to get some work done.
I fetched Mr. Goren's, or so the janitor called him, number and dialed.
"Hello?"
"Mr. Goren?"
"Yes?" he said full of anticipation.
"Your wife, sir, she's in labor."
"Oh god! Okay, I'm on my way," he said, as a door slammed and footsteps echoed faster than my heart rate.
I ducked in my seat as I saw him leave the elevator and hurry to his car. As he sped out of the parking lot, I got off the car, grabbed a screwdriver from my trunk, and headed to where his car was napping. The janitor told me that he saw Goren undo and redo a sign above his parking spot that said "staff only". And it also occurs that Goren forgot his keys at home that day. This janitor was the rightest choice I have ever made. Yet I believe that money wasn't his only motive. Like he was hate-driven or something. Maybe they weren't on good terms. Or maybe everything is just planned. The uselessness, the desperate need of help, and then the janitor. Who knows? He might be with them after all, and this could be a setup. But even if so, what will I do about it? Nothing. I will fall willingly into their trap just to smell her scent again. I used my screwdriver to undo the sign.
As expected, the key was there. I snatched it and ran towards the elevator. I located the right unit and dug my precious key. Click. I am in. I closed the door and sighed in relief. Then I headed slowly to the control panel, anxiety building up. The fact that I figured the way in never meant that I can figure how this panel works. And the fact that I haven't thought of this earlier sheds a spotlight on my severe stupidity and primitiveness.
It took me a life time to figure out how this crap-shit of a panel works. And when I did, I was overwhelmed by the power of this thing. Getting to this unit was everything I needed. With just a click of a button, I was able to change the password to Hazel's flat. I don't know the prices to this building's flats, but their security is pretty shitty. If I could do this by just getting into this room, or just even the fact that that Goren had access to all the flats, then Hazel was never safe. We should find her a new place then. When I get her back. Because I will.
After changing the passcode, I sat there for a moment considering my next move. It's considered a crime. But isn't sneaking into another man's workplace and hacking into other people's property a crime as well? Yeah. But that's more serious. Or, in other words, more dangerous. But I knew it will be. Actually, I knew from the beginning of it all. I knew what I brought upon myself, when I fell in love.

I find the nearest fire alarm, and I set off a false alarm. Let the fireworks begin.
I got back into my car and ducked down, making sure the security guards, escorting the residents out of the building, don't see me. I waited till the time seemed suitable enough and entered the building. There was no one. Or I thought so. A guard was there, either searching for other residents or looking for the fire source. No matter the reason, he shouldn't spot me. No one should. So I tiptoed and sneaked my way to the aspired apartment. Is it just me or do scary thoughts and anxiety attack you only when you're in desperate need of a clear mind and a confident posture? Maybe I really need a therapist after all.
I stood in front of the door half paralyzed and half pretending to be paralyzed. What if they didn't get the evacuation call? Or what if they were sleeping or something? That could end it all. But do you know what will end it even faster? A guard discovering me here, as I hesitate about whether I should proceed with saving my baby or just crumple and cry like a baby because I am scared. Terrified. I bet crying would be a thousand times easier. But that's the wimpy choice here. The choice that Hazel wouldn't take. The choice that hazel wouldn't approve of. The choice that kills Hazel and me, as a subsequent side effect.
I type the new code and, after a BING, the door clicked open. I man up and step in. nothing has changed. Not even the way I feel about this place. I can feel her in the air. Smell her. She's everywhere and nowhere. In every corner, I can swear I see her. But I also know I would do anything to comfort that agonized heart of mine, counting swearing. The walls are talking to me. Whispering in stories of us and telling me everything will be okay. And I can see the memories trailing hand in hand like they're leaving without a destination. I wanted to? Do you think so? Let's say I am not to be trusted anymore. My senses seem to malfunction.
It feels so soothing in here that I struggle to focus and get the job done. So alluring this place is. This aurora. I resist.
When I regained a fraction of my common sense, I dragged my legs to the main bedroom. Hazel's bedroom, which happen to, sadly, occupy two lying pigs, who I wouldn't mind strangling if The Purge was real. Second thoughts, if anything happened to Hazel, I wouldn't really need a purge to make these brutes pay.
I enter the room and anchor for the pillow. But there's two pillows now. For two people. Shit. Is any of them even hers? If so, then these people know nothing of hygiene. The orders were clear: go to her room and get her pillow. And other than these two pillows, there isn't more. So it must be one of them. But which one? I won't risk it. I take both.
On my way back, I take a last look at the apartment. I would kiss everything here goodbye if I had the time. Who know when I will ever come back here? If I ever did. As a threat of a tear alarms me, I stiffen and head to the door. I open the door to a startled face that gradually shifted into fury. The jerk that sleeps in Hazel's bed. Before I could think or give him a chance to react, I elbowed him hard in the face. Something cracked. I hope it was his jaw. He groaned hard and fell face down on the floor. Motionless. He's either unconscious or dead. In my right state of mind, I should pray it's the former. But I am a 100% hoping it's the latter. Oh Hazel, what have you done to me?
Just as I stepped out the door, I noticed it. A small surveillance camera right in front of the door that these scum must've installed to get me in trouble. Now everything seemed to sink in. The impossible task. The helpful janitor. The sudden visit. And now the camera. The psycho behind this took this shit to the next level. Why does he want my life ruined so bad!
I decided I had no more time to waste. I am already involved in this mess, so I should finish the task at least. Now that there was a motionless body and a recording of me causing such a case, it would never end well if I get caught now. I picked up the pillows I dropped and rushed back to my car.
I knew this wasn't going to end well, but I didn't expect to break all these laws and even get taped doing it. That man might be seriously injured or even dead. I can't explain how scared I am at the moment. Rushing to my car and knowing that after what happened there isn't a safe place or choice anymore. Everything as I know it has changed, and I am on my own. But what scares me the most is that I don't regret it. Not even a little bit.

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