Broken (Andy Biersack love story)

(One year later) chapter 20

Its been an entire year since Andy has passed on. I've never really recovered from the incident. I still felt empty on the inside, I've tried to hide my pain by smiling. I have faked a smile everyday since Andy left me. It burned inside of me, I felt as if I had no feeling left.......numb was All I ever felt. My mind was complete blackness, my heart was shattered I'll never be the same.

As much I'd love to move on I can't, it's like he's been with me my whole life. Im holding on to him for dear life. I won't let go, it unhealthy for me. Matt is worried for me, but I just isolate myself now. I can't do this on my own. I need him, like a child needs their mother. I want, I need, I crave for his love.

My feeling for him will fill me one day, I was blessed with a curse. This pain feels like it will never end. It's a never-ending cycle of pain, and hate. I hate the fact he's gone forever and I didn't do shit to save him. I fucking hate myself and life. I'm done with all of it, I want to leave, and I know exactly how I'll go.

I'm was pretty sure I knew what I was getting into and knowing what I was doing. I'm sorry for people but I need to do what's best for me. I won't live with the fact I hurt Matt, Val, Brain, Johnny, Zacky, and Jimmy. I won't ever be able to change what I've done after it's done.

I waited for Matt to leave along with Val, I walked into his room. I found the gun he had in his room. I grabbed it and stared at it. The gun lied in my hands, and I walked to my room, I had to do this before he got home. I wrote Matt, Val, All the A7X guys along with all the Black Veil Brides except for Andy of course.

I neatly put them on my bed and I sat an the ground, I put the gun on my temple and I slowly counted to three. "1........2........3" and on that three i pulled the trigger to the gun, blackness after that. It was finally over.