Chapter Nine: What If?

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This is really emotional. You guys get to learn a lot more about Lucas and a recap of Anna's life. It's short and sweet :) The good stuff is happening really soon! Also, MIKEYS HAIR IS FRIGGIN BLUE AGAIN BUT BETTER THIS TIME HE LOOKSMLIKE A BLUEBERRY WE SHOULD CALL THIS ONE PUNK SMURF 2.0 OR BLUEBERRY OR SHARKBOY OKAY LIKE DAMM YES

Lucas' POV

My high life of vacation time in L.A ended yesterday and today I arrived home with Kaitlyn and she went on her way to her parent's house where they'd most likely bombard her with questions on how it was and what happened there. Spring Break was the nightmare to all parents.

Anna was also home because she needed time off from her life in Seattle and honestly, I didn't blame her. Being a Stylinson kid was really cool. The ginormous house, the clothes, the room, the cars, the pool, the parties, yet, none of that mattered to me. What mattered was they were a great family. They spent as much time as possible with us, and when we couldn't they'd text us or something telling us how much they loved us. I had really cool uncles, too. Liam would be up for anything. I'd ask him to go skydiving, he'd do it. He's always up for some cool experiences and adventure. Niall knows the best places in the city to eat and he would take me golfing or even mini golfing. Then there was Zayn who you could just chill with, telling him what's on your mind and he'd make it so easy for you to talk to him and just listen and we'd make inside jokes and have a laugh. Then there was my dads. My crazy, idiotic, adorable dads. They seemed to always make my life brighter.

For example, I'm feeling down, Harry would tell me the stupidest jokes ever and I'd laugh. Or Louis would take me outside for some footy and we'd kick it our until our hearts stopped beating and we collapse onto the grass. I'm having a bad day, they'd take me out for ice cream and we'd just talk about random things and enjoy our time together. Or if I'm having girl trouble, they'd tell me that's why they're gay.

I was sat on top of the roof outside of my room. My room had a little window in it and right beside it is a lower part of the roof and I like to climb onto it and just lay down, looking at the stars and just think. What I was doing right now. Every thought that came to mind I'd just appreciate it and move to the next one. It was like a soothing therapy.

Anna and I have become a lot closer, too. To think she hated me seemed so weird now. If you told the thirteen year old me that I'd like Anna more and be two peas in a pod, I would have laughed and said you're insane. But now, we've really warmed up to each other and I think we're finding it nice to have someone to talk to who understands what we've gone through. Needless to say, we need each other.

"Hey," Anna's voice startles me as she peeked her head out the window, snapping her head to the right to see me laying across the roof. "Dads say dinner's almost ready. You coming?"

"Yeah, just give me a sec."

"Actually, mind if I join you?"

I shrug and she swings one leg out the window and walks along the little ledge to get to the roof patch I lay on. My arms are tucked underneath my head, gazing at the stars as I hear Anna lay down next to me. "This is nice."

"Yeah, I like to come up here and just think, looking at the stars and seeing if I can make different connect the dots designs into them." I blurt out.

She hums in approval, "I wish I had a roof by my room. Audd and I just had a rope swing outside our window."

"Only?" I scoff. "That's amazing."

"Right!? We would swing off it into the pool below!" She pauses, frowning as she licks her lips a bit and it's as if she's remembering something. "...I miss it. I miss living here. I can barely go into our bedroom without wanting to break down and cry beause Audd's all the way in Miami, Florida and the room is so...empty. It's like we never even lived there. I miss the old house a lot, too. Like, I kind of wish you were to grow up in that home instead. It was the best place to ever be raised in. I remember the first night those two bafoons and our uncles came to adopt me. That day I was literally about to lose every ounce of hope into finding a family who would love me for me. Be the loving, caring, understanding parents I'd only ever dreamed of having again. I regretted so much, though, that I thought I'd screw up whatever family came to adopt me this time, too. I mean, my last words to my biological family was 'I hate you, Mommy and Daddy!' and I left with my best friend to go to a stupid birthday party in Primary School when I was six. Every day I have to remember that and regret it all over again and I just...I just wish I could tell them I didn't mean it and that I loved them. But, I can't. So, when the boys adopted me I had a hard time trying to open up to them and to realize they loved me just like I had dreamt of and I just...I'm so thankful to have them. I don't say that nearly as much as I should, but, if they hadn't adopted me, I wouldn't ever know a family that's better than this."

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