The Dividing Line: ABSOLUTION #COMPLETED (Book 3)

16 ѱ LETTER #2 (BWWM)

(REGINA)

Dear Heart,

I know it's been a while since I was able to send you a letter. I must start by apologizing for my infrequent communications with you. I'm sure you will find it hard to believe that after all these years, I still find myself inexplicably lost whenever I think of you and our time together.

Maybe, because what we shared was so forbidden and intense, I became addicted to you and the love you lavished on me. But, baby, I still remember your smile and the way your clear blue eyes lit up as I walked down the street on my way to you.

Everyone told me, "Stay away from that cracker before you get yourself hurt," but how could they understand that I couldn't deny myself your affections willingly? You loved me in such a real and raw way I had never experienced before. Not only did you make me feel special, but I could see your feelings every time I found myself drawn into the ocean depths of your eyes.

For me to still hold that love in my heart, do you know how strong the pull is? I do, and even though so many years have passed, I have experienced and forgotten so much more, but I could never forget YOU.

With all the animosity and hate my family unleashed on you, I never regretted meeting you. I only wanted to stay by your side to ease your pain somehow.

Their attempts to reprogram me to hate you and all white people were fruitless. By resisting their efforts to control me, my family finally became so angry with mee, that their answer was to remove me from the city. To keep me away from you, they sent me to my grandmother's house in Shreveport, Louisiana.

Once my grandmother realized I hadn't traveled that long distance alone, I was already four months pregnant. Back then, my situation was completely unacceptable.

Only eighteen.

Unmarried.

Pregnant.

My predicament cemented my family's decision to make sure everyone ostracized me.

I wasn't allowed to make friends, leave the house unchaperoned, or talk to anyone. Because I was with a child by a white man, my family members made sure I was basically incarcerated in my grandmother's house and only allowed to go to church with my grandmother.

Prenatal appointments were few, and they ensured I was never allowed the time or space to be by myself again.

Because I wasn't from the area, nobody knew or cared about my situation. That's what they did back then. Whenever an unmarried girl got pregnant, she was sent far away to hide the child from the world. My family was so determined to hide the truth they made sure no one knew my marital situation, who impregnated me. Just before our son was born, they hired a midwife to help me give birth to our son to avoid the knowing looks of the white doctors at the hospital.

They told me I was a disgrace, and they made sure I knew that every day.

Until he was two years old, they gave me false hope of allowing me to keep him. Can you imagine how it felt to be heartbroken but gifted with a little bundle that looked just like you? He was such a beautiful baby, and he reminded me of you in every way. I gave him all the love I for you, him, and me. Since that was all I could do, I made sure that adorable little blond-haired boy felt our love.

When we settled into our little routine as a family, my uncle came and took my baby away from me.

For so long, I had no idea where he was or with whom. It was as if my life was over because of how closely they guarded that secret. Then, to make matters worse, they forced me to stay down South for three more years before I could return home.