"oh god i killed him" im gasping and trying not to flop like a giraffe
"its ok lisa its oookkkkk" lucy is soothing me
"we need to revive him" says dumbledore wisely but i think he is an oaf
"but how" says lucy as milk squirts out of her eyes
"im magical you idiot" says dumbledore
"oh yeah well go go go" says lucy cause shes barney and she rules the world
"kk brb" says dumbledore and he puts a hand on his hip like he is all girly and cool
"you dont know text language" im sighing at him
"yh ino" he says
"your at it again" says lucy "now just reincarnate gandalf already"
"ok i will" says dumbledore and he's rolling his eyes
he just starts saying "hakunamatata llama llama" and i dont think its working cause gandalf is still dead
"it doesnt work" he says
"oh what will we do now" i scream
suddenly there is a person going "AAAAHHHHH" like a jungle - man and they swoop in on a vine
"frodo" im saying
frodo has nothing on but a brown thing around his butt and he is a jungle - man
"yes im here to save gandalf" he says and he looks into the distance like he is in a dramatic movie
"yeah yeah get on with it" im rolling my eyes at him
so he starts doing a dance and says "oppa gangnam style"
we all join in and suddenly gandalf bursts into life
"lets save that kid from a lifetime of fatness" he cries
and we all follow him as we run to save the child
we are here now and we peek through his window
"he's eating fruit and veg he is so unhealthy it disgusts me" i say as i hold my nose
"HE NEEDS FUNGUS" shouts lucy and i just get a knife and stab her mouth so she cant talk
"now lets go in" im whispering now and everyone just follows me to his front door while lucy just flops around on the ground like a fish while blue goo comes out of her mouth
i knock on his door and a woman answers
"hello" she says
"hi do you have a son" i say like a business woman / goat
"yes yes i do why" she says as she wipes her nose with gandalfs hair
"well has he gotten his daily dose of.." im pulling out a bottle of fungus "FUNGUS"
she gasps and all her hair falls out
"no no he hasnt I NEED TO GIVE IT TO HIM" she screams and then she slams the door and runs off to get fungus
"our work here is done" i say proudly then i command dumbledore to make lucy un - stabbed and he does because im the elephant queen and everyone listens to me
"we best be off" the wizards aka gandalf and dumbledore say poshly
"okiedokie but maybe you can help us we have butt - o - lop - olis and its our last night" im saying with puppy dog eyes
they just laugh and say "well you are goners hahahahahaha"
lucy and lisa have no hope.. maybe frodo can save them!! or maybe not... well you never know unless you fan and be updated for when i update which will be about 20 minutes well yeah bye
YOU ARE READING
THE CHRISTMAS SURPRISE (TCS book 1)
HumorI never knew what my christmas surprise would be... but I didn't expect it to be bad!
