Hold Me

Chapter 1

I missed the days where everything was happy. The days where we would enjoy each others company. Spend quality time together. But that all changed when mom died.

Dad stopped spending time with me. Stopped being happy. Stopped being an actual dad to me. He started drinking. Hanging out with "friends".

When dad was drunk, he was violent. He would scream, throw things and hurt me. Physically and mentally. I cried myself to sleep almost every night. Wishing sometimes that I wouldn't wake up.

I barely slept, so it was hard to focus at school. I was somehow still passing my classes. That was the only time where I felt safe. I knew that he wouldn't be able to hurt me when I was at school. It was my escape from my home life.
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I woke up to my alarm which I turned off and then rubbed my eyes. I had a hard time falling asleep like most nights.

My dad had been loud last night with his "friends" which kept me up till almost 3am.

After turning on the light, I changed into a hoodie and leggings. I pretty much always wore this. It hid the secrets that I kept from everyone. I put on a bit of makeup and made sure to cover the bruises on my neck.

I grabbed my school bag and then grabbed a granola bar before heading out the door. Dad out cold on the couch.

I walked to the bus stop and waited for the bus. It was quite chilly out, so I crossed my arms to try and stay warm. When the bus came, I took my usual spot and then laid my head against the window.

After the ride to school, I walked to my locker and grabbed my stuff before heading to first period.

The day dragged but finally we had a free period which was lunch. I sat down at a table with my friend Amy.

"Hey Sam." She said, smiling.

I gave a small smile back. "Hi Amy."

We talked a bit while she ate.

I never really ate lunch. We didn't have much food in the house due to dad losing his job not to long ago. Most of the time, the cupboards and fridge were pretty empty.

After lunch, I had a couple more periods before the bell rung to go home. I always dreaded the end of the school day, knowing I had to go back to the place I call home.

I got on the bus and laid my head against the window. The ride was about 30 minutes so I decided to close my eyes.

I woke up to someone tapping my shoulder. I looked up to see a man with blonde hair and glasses. He was wearing scrubs and I read his name tag to see his name was Dr Michael Clifford.

"I see you normally get off in a few stops. Just wanted to make sure you didn't miss your stop." He said.

I nodded. "Thank you."

He nodded, sitting back in his seat.

I rubbed my eyes, getting my things together before getting off at my stop. I could feel the man watch me get off.

I walked up the sidewalk to my house, unlocking the door with my key. I walked in to see my dad already stumbling around.

"Where the hell have you been?" He asked.

I tried to stay calm. "I was at school."

He grumbled. "Get me a beer."

I nodded fast, going into the kitchen and grabbing him a beer before handing it to him. He snatched it out of my hand.

I took that as my que to go up to my room.

After putting my stuff down, I locked the door and then laid on my bed. It wasn't long before I heard my dad yelling downstairs. I grabbed my pillow and covered my ears, trying to block out the noise.

I hated it here. I just want to feel loved and wanted. But all I am is unloved and not wanted.
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I hope everyone is doing okay. If anyone ever needs to talk, I'm here💜