I would rather go blind

All Alone

After the ambulance left all of my neighbors were out and seeking answers from me. I am so tired of nosey people.

*Alright, show is over now get in your disfunctional houses people"

"and yes I mean that with disrespect   I'm not sorry"

My whole body feels drained as if there were something holding it to the ground. I can bearly contain the urge to breakdown and cry. My mother and I were barely conversation but that womon loves me, that is the woman who encourages me to fight when I no longer can. I can not bare the thought of losing her. I do not even want to eat today I just want to stay in my room, in the comforting darkness. One minute everything is good and the next minute one minor thing changes your life in a major fashion. Altough this is not minor is it? I throw my body on my bed and turn on my radio and play some music from my 'stormy weather' Playlist. My whole curtain is open and I can see the city from afar through the lace.

I am drowning in a whole Tsunami of tears. I feel like an Earthquake just struck and it missed everyone but me. What sorcery is this, I have never felt this kind of pain on my entire life and I have been through the most. I am already tired, someone please help me anyone. I am sending a message to the universe through my brain, please deliver me from this pain and loneliness. I need to go to the hospital but how?

I hear a knock on the door and I am too lazy to go there. I continue drifting off to the solitude and space  in my mind. I swear I am losing it, I can not and this is just the first few hours. I hear a knock again but this time it is close. It's Freddy, he is outside my window on the tree that is near my window. I go to the window and open it.

"I heard what happened and I figured you need somebody to be with you"

"and the universe sent you"

"I guess so, can I come in or do you want to go see your mom"

I choose my mother and Freddy took me to the hospital with his friends car. Is he not the most amazing?