Cloudy Skies -BTS 8th Member-

│File: Chapter 12│

TW?? (idk im putting this just incase to be safe-): £@t!ng D!$0rd£r

Clearly I never thought through sleeping at my desk. My neck feels like I've just stabbed it all over and broke it and then un-broke it and then broke it again and set it on fire. I would complain about my back, but I have bad posture and always sit like the letter 'c' I'm pretty sure my spine hates me for that but oh well.

About an hour ago Seokjin came and woke me up, telling me to go eat but I've generally gave up on food. I'm just not hungry anymore so I just told him that I'll eat later. I thought I was getting better, but my life is generally 99% spent going downhill than uphill. So, the thought of it returning didn't exactly shock me. all my clothes feel too uncomfy and I have so much fat on my body it just looks horrible no matter what I wear.

Finally deciding to sort my pain caused by my 10/10 sleep, I went out and grabbed some pain killers along with a drink of water before walking off to my room again. I know I have places to be, but it all seems too much today. It's the same as every day but today feels slower, longer, and more tiring.

But its usual to have days like that. It happens to everybody. So instead of laying around I dragged myself out of bed (after 10 minutes of struggle) and got changed, then packed my bag and headed out after another glass of water and taking a box of pain killers with me in case the pain hasn't died down by lunchtime.

I'll save you the boring walk and not much happened, mainly because I was too tired to think about anything and it was a slow and quite a long walk compared to everyday. I mean, it could be like that every day, yet my head is too busy to notice. That's usually the reason these days feel so long. I have nothing to think about when I normally do. i don't notice or care as much which leaves my brain dead. But it's also so hard when you have nothing to think about because what do you do then?

currently I sat seated in a meeting room. Something about explaining the concept of the BTS storyline in more detail but it means my schedule will be stretched out longer if that makes sense.
Not that it's much of a bother. I think they're using it this time while the other members go to an interview, most likely about me or something. Not really bothered at this given time plus I'll just watch it when it comes out or ask Hoseok what it was about.

I feel like an interview is one of those things were u feel stupid for feeling nervous after its done. You know, like even though you've slept over at your friend's' house lots of times it's like a second home u still feel nervous to stay over, but when you wake up you always feel stupid for worrying about it the day before.

...or am I the only one who feels like that.

maybe its because I've always lacked in the friend's department, I've only had one friend and they usually leave after getting what they need. Still, I cherish our friendship and fight for it as if I don't know what they're doing. In this present time though I live in a house, with 7 men, and most of them hate me. I guess it saves the friendship part so now I don't have to feel as shitty about it.

The door opens startling me, quickly turning off my phone from the game I was playing. i usually play it on my laptop but I have it on my phone for when I'm not home or in a place I can have my laptop. The staff members made their way in and we all bowed before getting straight down to business.

The meeting was longer than I thought, when they said "more detail" I generally thought they just meant like a few minor things but no they meant like every single spec of detail and not a topic left untouched. It was clearly well though over vERy well because my brain literally stopped functioning from all the information. The meeting even took all the way up to lunchtime, they also mentioned how sometime this week we'll talk about how I fit into it all.

So now I sat in the dance room alone. I just came straight here now so maybe I can go home straight away after lessons. But as soon as I got here I didn't want to practice or stretch or anything.

there is one thing I want to do though and that would be sleep.

sleep for the rest of my life and listen to music.

that's all I need in life, sound pretty accurate does it not? Now thinking about it I could listen to a few songs. Grabbing my phone, I open it and head to Spotify before clicking on a Mitski song. Because stan Mitski.

a few minutes have passed a couple more songs have finished, and I'm still sat here. Clearly not planning on moving anytime soon. I have about 30 minutes before any group comes in here (I think) and before I need to go to lessons. But of course, my peaceful time was cut short by the door opening. I can never get a break. The person came past the little corner from where the door is to show a familiar face but now, with much brighter hair.

--------------------------------------------
Cloud- I do not enjoy being misgendered and deadnamed the whole week at school thank you very much, 0/10 experience didn't miss it at all.

Sorry for the short chapter I'm too tired to use my tiny brain to come up with another 200 odd words.

Words- 1023

NOT PROOF-READ

thank you Lisacoco27 doing a great job.