three more years

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sometimes, when the lights flick off
and all is dark, quiet, and still
I see him in my eyelids

sometimes, I'll see those sneakers
on a stranger in an elevator
and have to fight back memories

sometimes, that song will play
and his voice replaces it
and my ears throb

sometimes, I wonder if he'll ever leave
if one day my head will be too full
of love for him to take up space

sometimes, I wish I could forgot everything
because remembering is too hard
and I can't control it

sometimes, I realize I'm healing
that I am free
that I am safe

sometimes, I remember the human body replaces everything every seven years
and in three years
I will have a body you've never touched

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