Trust [h.s.]

XV

        Later that night, I stood in the shower, remaining utterly motionless as the falling droplets pelted my dampened skin. The pellets rolled down my body in sleek streaks that dripped to the floor of the shower, then swirled down the drain in thick spirals. I let my mind wander as my stationary frame maintained an unmoving stance.

I needed to organize my thoughts. There were so many of them that crashed and collided within my skull, bumping against one another in a contradicting and confusing jumble of absolute clutter. The source of my disorganization was Harry. I was torn in half. Part of me-the reasonable part-scorned and resented Harry. She was hateful of him and the situation itself. This part of me imagined scenarios of escaping Harry's hold, running to the police, returning to my life. This half of me told myself that I was merely pretending to befriend Harry, and instead of actually enjoying his company, I was gaining his trust so that I could successfully create an operative plan that had me running for the hills.

But there was another part of me, an equally as strong part that felt compelled to stay. This part of me told my brain that my warming up to Harry had nothing to do with escaping. This half of me, as crazy as she was, could feel herself liking Harry, as in holding onto actual feelings of longing towards him. And she thought maybe, just maybe, he felt it too.

I ran a hand over my face in frustration, feeling completely and utterly lost. I hadn't a clue as to what to do. I could try to escape, but I knew that there was a danger to that. The only other alternative to that was staying with Harry forever and though I'd grown to enjoy him, I knew I'd go crazy if I remained cooped up in Harry's house for the rest of my life.

I then realized my only option.

I needed to learn more about Harry's business. I needed to gather information and use it to my advantage. I needed to defeat the system myself. I was going to set myself free, or die trying.

~*~

 "That might have been the longest shower in human history." Harry joked as I stepped into the living room, feeling the remaining water droplets roll down the shafts of my hair, then drip onto my back.

"Sorry," I shrugged. "I was just...thinking."

"What about?"

I plopped down beside him on the coach, remaining momentarily quiet as I built up the courage to say the words that clawed at my throat. I took a deep breath.

"Harry," I said calmly, turning my head so that I faced him. "I need you to tell me about your work."

Harry's brows immediately furrowed as he absorbed my statement, frustration clouding his previously open features. I knew I should have gone about that in a much smoother manner, perhaps easing into the conversation rather than blurting it out, but if I had held it in any longer, I thought I was going to explode.

 "What?" Was all he said, daring me to repeat myself, assuming I'd back down and retract my previous sentance.

"I-I need you to tell me about your business." I said again.

"You're ridiculous," Harry said, rising from the coach. "We've been over this a thousand times, Ellie. You know I can't tell you anyth-"

"Harry, please," I grabbed his arm, pulling him back down to a sitting position. "Please just talk to me. We can do this without you getting angry and me getting upset. We can speak like two civilized adults. I don't want to fight with you, I just really need to know some things."

"Ellie, I can't-"

"Please Harry," I stared directly into his sparkling eyes, the vibrant color shining beneath the darkened pupils. "I'm unable to communicate with anyone outside of this house. It's not like I'm going to tell anyone."

"I'm just trying to keep you safe." He spoke in a whisper, his features contorting into a pained expression.