Saving Lucifer

Confessions

A few days later the nurse brought me soup for lunch. Not hungry due to grace coursing through me now, I declined it.

"Is your throat still bothering you?" she asked in concern.

"Oh, no. I'm just not hungry."

"I see. The meds can sometimes make you lose your appetite but you'll need to show you can eat before you're allowed to leave." she explained.

"Even if I'm not hungry?" My brows furrowed in irritation.

"Yeah, that's how it works."

"Fine, leave it. I'll eat it eventually."

Nodding, she set the bowl on the sliding tray next to my bed.

Once she left, I lay back against the bed and closed my eyes. It's been quite boring in here without visitors. Castiel told me he would be in later today, which made me happy. Sam and Dean were off hunting again now that they knew I was reunited with grace and fully healed.

Lucifer hadn't come by since the first day he was there. He did check in on me remotely, though. A lot.

-How's the most stubborn Nephalem I know? His voice ran through my ears creating a smile.

She's extremely bored. How are the kids?

-Rambunctious. Abigail misses you. She keeps asking when Auntie Angel will be home.

Feeling my heart swell with warmth at those words, I smiled.

Tell her I miss her, too. Hey, is Cas alright? He seems...distracted.

-Seems fine to me. But then again, he really doesn't sit and chat with me willingly. Gabriel and I have talked a lot lately.

Intrigued by this news, I pried for more.

Really?

-Yeah, he says I deserve a second chance and he's willing to give me that.

You do deserve it, Luce. I smiled.

"Thanks to you." he appeared in the chair next to me causing me to jump.

"What the hell, Luce?! Don't do that!" My hand was on my chest over my heart, feeling it racing.

"Sorry," he chuckled.

Sitting up, I turned to face him sitting cross-legged.

"What brings you here?" I asked out of curiosity.

"I'm not allowed to come to see you now?" he scoffed, raising his hand to his chest and acting hurt.

"Shut up. You know what I mean. You've only been talking with me remotely lately."

"No one can hear our conversations when we talk like that." he shrugged.

"They can't? Wouldn't that connection break when I became human?"

"Yes. But when I gave you the grace, yours is not only mixed with Castiel's and Azriel's, it is now mixed with some of mine. So, now we have a personal connection." he explained.

"Wasn't your grace mixed within me before? I mean, you are part of the reason I became what I became."

"Yes, but this was different. This isn't combining with someone's at the same time to create something. This is just full-on grace straight from me."

Smiling, I nodded, understanding.

"So, any plans now that you're back to 100% and you're with Abbie?"

"Well, I thought about taking her and showing her the world. But I think she might be too young for that still. And she seems quite attached to you guys."

"Luce, if leaving it what you want to do, I won't ask you to stay. You're not forced to stay with us."

Smiling he looks down at his fingers, picking at them.

"I know. I just don't want to rip her out of a stable environment. I may be dense but I have learned a lot from you in the time we've become friends. You taught me understanding, compassion, empathy, patience, and love. No one else would have even thought about helping me when you did. You were my last resort. I honestly had nowhere else to turn if you would have rejected me."

"Well, you really didn't give me the option to reject you." I snarked.

"At first, yes. And I'm sorry for that. I never should have pushed, pressured, or threatened you like that. That's something the old me would have done. I was scared of losing my little girl. She's the reason I even wanted to change, to become better. She's what gave me a reason to be good."

I smiled, knowing what it feels like to have that very moment when your entire life changes. You no longer live for yourself, you are now living and breathing for your child and your only goal is to be a hero in their eyes.

"Angel, thank you." he said moving the chair closer and taking my hand.

Confused, an eyebrow arched as I waited for his explanation.

"Yes, Abigail gave me a reason to be better. But you gave me the chance to be. When every single person was against me, hell, even against you for helping me, you never gave up on me. You fought for me. I've never had that in my life. Never. Thank you for giving me the chance to prove that I am a better man."

Patting his hand with the hand he wasn't holding, I smiled.

He looked into my eyes, making sure I was fully invested in the conversation. Raising my hand to his lips, he kissed my knuckles and said,

"I'm serious, Angel."

"No, Luce. You saved yourself by finally seeing the good in life. Now, come here, stop with the mushy stuff. It's not like you to be so emotional." I laughed, gesturing for him to stand up and hug me.

Wrapping his arms around my shoulders, I leaned into his torso and wrapped my arms around him. This body felt different. It was firmer. I didn't like it; it wasn't as cuddly but I squeezed him tightly anyway. He leaned back, placing his index finger under my chin raising my face to look at him. Staring down into my eyes, he smiled, his eyes sparkled.

"Thank you, for saving me in more ways than one."