CW: Mention of depression
Harry was feeling anxious. He was feeling down. It was one of those days when he felt like shit and nothing could help him. He kept thinking about his parents, about Sirius, about Remus. About their relationship. Why did they not tell him? Why did it feel like the only family he had, were like strangers to him?
Dumbledore's Army meetings had been helping him to take his mind off things. But then again Hermione and Ron gave him concerned looks. Molly would keep asking him how he was. Arthur would still keep offering help to get a job. And he honestly wanted to be left alone. Also there was Malfoy. He didn't know how to behave around him anymore. He didn't even know what to think about the kiss. He wasn't into lads, or maybe yes. Harry didn't know. And there was Ginny. He truly loved her, right? Besides this was Malfoy. The fucking abuser wanker. But yet he had changed...
Arrrg! Harry was confused about everything and he just wanted to dissapear. And the stupid protest was in 8 hours. Dumbledore's Army 2.0 had planned a huge protest and punch against The Ministry. To give their point of view. Harry believed there was no point anymore. He was thinking of missing it, but he was their leader. Everyone expected him to be there.
Harry moaned and covered himself with his sheets. Finally getting some sleep.
Harry must've slept for two hours when he woke up again. It was still night time. He moved on his bed. Casted Lumos, Lumos Maxima, like he used to do at The Dursleys to calm him down. But nothing worked. He couldn't sleep.
Harry looked around. Pictures of his parents, of Sirius, Remus. Pictures of his friends of Ginny hunted him. We couldn't take it anymore. Harry got out of the room and went to Dumbledore's portrait placed on the living room. Perhaps talking to that empty portrait would help him.
"I'm feeling pretty shitty, okay?" he said. His voice echoed in the empty house of Grimmaund Place. Harry could hear Kreacher moving on his sleep.
"I don't know what to do. And you were the only one who guided me. You would have a piece of advice or a clever phrase to lighten me. But now you're gone. And you fucking left me empty, lost, scared..."
Harry sighed. The portrait remained empty.
"What am I supposed to do?" he continued "Everyone expects me to just move on. To get a job and be successful. But I'm scared..." he sighed "I'm actually scared that I won't be able to do anything on my own. That I won't have the same 'luck' I had when I was younger. My friends support. And your guidance. Because it is because of that, that I managed to do what I did. And what about the people who died?" Harry couldn't stop talking. Tears rolled down his face.
"They deserved better than I did... I don't know how to be this leader and world changer everyone expects... I'm lost..." he started sobbing "Nobody understands but I am lost..."
Harry covered his face on his hands sobbing like he hadn't done in a long time. He needed it.
"I'm so sorry to hear that Harry"
Harry jumped. He looked around to see Dumbledore on his portrait. He wasn't particularly smiling but his eyes were comforting.
"Professor?" Harry asked wiping away his tears.
"I guess I'm not your teacher anymore Harry. I'm dead, remember?" the portrait smiled.
Harry didn't find it funny at all.
"You were listening to me?" he sniffed.
"Of course I do. I always do"
"But you're always at Hogwarts..."
YOU ARE READING
POST WAR
FanfictionWhat happened after The War? Do you think it was easy for The Golden Trio after that? A little story o how Harry Potter and his friends had to deal with the consequences of the war, the losses it brought and their mental peace. As well as the pressu...
