ᴠɪᴄᴛᴏʀɪᴀ (ON HOLD)

18:ᵇʳᵒᵏᵉⁿ

LUCAS

I watch her. 

She's so beautiful. I want to tell her. I want to make her mine badly. 

As the song I recently discovered plays softly, she moves her pretty head along as she finishes her turkey sandwich. I'm happy she likes it. 

Well I hope she likes it. 

But she'll probably freak out if I tell I like her a lot or punch me in the face. 

"Can you sing along? You've got a really nice voice"

She says while taking a sip of her drink. She licks her lips afterwards and fuck that is sexy. 

Not to sound like a pervert or a sexist but I really want to do naughty things to her. 

Don't get me wrong, what I feel for Victoria isn't all sexual. Sure I dream about doing unspeakable things with her cause she’s sexy as fuck but my romantic feelings for her are real. I know it's real. 

I hope it's real.

Right, she asked me a question.

She likes my voice? Huh. Cool.

I would sing along, on god, I would do anything for her at this point but I don't know Mandarin. 

And no Japanese and Chinese aren't alike at all. Sure, a few words or phrases may sound alike but they are still two different languages.

"I don't really know Mandarin" 

"Oh really?"

Wait she knows I'm Japanese, right? I thought Daisy told her. 

"Yeah because I'm Japanese not Chinese I thought Daisy told you"

"Yeah I do, she did. It's just that I don't know, Japanese, Chinese. Similar, right?"

Oh. I don't know what I should feel about that statement. It’s a bit racially insensitive but we move. 

Everybody in this shit hole region make jokes all the time about me being Chinese. Do I accept it? No

She groans out before saying,

"That's racist, isn't it? I’m so sorry. "

A bit but I just shrug,

"I've been told worse"

"That does not make me feel better. I'm better than this. I don't know why I'm like this tonight. I think I'm stressed or something but I shouldn’t. Today is one of my best days in a while. I hate myself right now. Now I'm talking too much, am I?" 

No, no you're not. I'm listening. Continue,

"No, keep going. I will always listen to you"

I can't help but look into her eyes, her pretty eyes. Everything about her is so fucking perfect.

I want to kiss her so bad.

I pray to God she doesn't hear how fast my heart is beating.

What is she doing to me?

She looks down at my lips for a second. 

Oh fuck. Holy shit. 

She's just so, I don't know perfect.

She looks away and fiddles with her hands on her lap. 

I can't keep my eyes off her. We are on a fucking high way and I can't keep my eyes off her.