Me: SSSSSSHHHHHHIIIIIIIPPPPPPPSSSSSSSSSS
Sophie: oh no
Me: TODAY WE WILL BE DOING SHIPS I HAVE WAITED FOR THIS MOMENT SINCE I WOKE UP THIS MORNING
Dex: what are- oh...
Biana: i don't get- oh
Tam: what are- OH NO
Me: OH YESSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Keefe: why is everybody- ohhhhhhhh
Fitz: this is going to be... interesting
Linh: oh wow
Me: ima do the ones with Sophie first. so there's Sokeefe, Sofitz, Sotam, Sophiana, Solinh, Solinhiana, Soalden, So-
Sophie: isn't Alden like, 450 something years old?
Me: yeah, don't ask me why thats a thing. Sophorke is like that too
Sophie: wait, SOPHOKLE?
Me: mhm. but don't worry. Soalden and Sophokle are illegal.
Sophie: okay.. whats Solinhiana? oh wait...
Me: its a ship with you, Biana, and Linh!
Linh: how does that even work?
Me: okay, so basically person A is dating person B and person C, person B is dating person A and C, and person C is dating persons A and B
Biana: sorry, but we're just friends. and whats Sophiana?
Me: you and Sophie
Biana: again, we're just friends
Me: yeah, i know. sometimes the fandom comes up with stuff that wasn't implied in the first place. i used to ship Sophiana, but that was before- wait! i almost spoiled a ship! never mind
Keefe: Sokeefe is me and Foster right?
Me: SOKEEFE IS MY 100% SHIP
Keefe: your my new best friend. whats your name even?
Me: i cant put my real name on the internet, so you can call me Wolfie
Keefe: got it
Fitz: can we talk about Sofitz?
Me: NEVER YOU DONT DESERVE HER YOU SHOULD END UP WITH DEXXXXXX(yeah im one of them get over it)
Dex and Fitz: WHAT
Me: Detz for life! you can also call it FedEx though
Sophie: isn't that a human postage company?
Me: yup
Sophie: wait... Sotam?
Tam: friends
Sophie: just friends
Me: yeah whoever came up with that is crazy. oh! i forgot Dexphie!
Sophie and Dex: We're not a thing
Me: yeah, that Ship sunk
Keefe: HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAH i see what you did there
Me: okay, we are done with Sophie's ships. now Biana's. Bianex, Bialinh, Kiana, and MY ULTAMATE SHIP MORE THAN SOKEEFE Tamiana
Tam: *hides in shadows*
Biana: oh oh oh oh...
Sophie: this is fun when it isn't you
Me: Tam already ships it! you said it in Neverseen! HE SHIPS IT! HE SHIPS IT!
Biana: oh...
Me: i used to ship Bianex. on gacha club a made you Biana Dizznee. THAT WAS BEFORE OKAY!!
Dex: *so quiet nobody can hear it* she wouldn't like me back anyway
Me: Kiana is a lost cause. he doesn't like you back Biana
Biana: i know..
Keefe: *oblivious* i don't get it
Me: we're not even going to talk about any more Biana ships. the rest are garbage. Dexypoo your next
Dex: what
Me: i didn't say nothinnnnnnnnn especially not Dexypoooooooooooo
Fitz: but you DID say-
Me: SHADAP I SAID NOTHIN
Sophie: oooookayyyyy
Me: so theres Keefex, Marella and Dex IDK what you guys are called, and my OTP DETZ
Dex: im not in love with wonderboy!
Me: yeah you are! Fitz flexed his muscles in front of you!
Dex: YOU DID
Fitz: I don't even remember doing that
Me: it happened in neverseen LOOK. *Snaps fingers and copies of never seen appear*
Sophie: oh... it did happen
Fitz: I DIDN'T MEAN IT THAT WAY
Dex: EWWWWWW WONDERBOY LIKES ME
Fitz: I DONT
Linh: what have you done
Me: *shrugs* ive done worse
Biana: somehow i believe that
Me: moving on... Linh has all the boys im to lazy to list them all, Sophie and Biana blah blah blah... and LYLIE FOR THE WINH now lets move right along shall we?
Fitz and Dex: *still arguing*
Me: Tam has like, three ships... Sotam which we already established as not gonna happen, Tamiana which will happen, and Tam and Marella I SEE YOU SHAKING YOUR HEAD BANGS BOY! SHE WAS CHECKING YOU OUT IN LODESTAR LOOK *gives him a copy of Lodestar*
Sophie: um...
Keefe: im spared
Me: yeah, i covered all you ships. nobody needs to know fitz's ships they were all covered as well. im bored now *table falls next to me* you know what... you guys deal with this. im out
