The beauty within the truth

Chapter 1

(I just changed this scene a little)

I go outside to get away from everything. I just need a break from that stupid party. I put my head in my hands, what am I gonna do.. ugh I wish Benji didn't have a boyfriend, I wish I had told Mia and Lake on the first day of school.. I wish my parents weren't going through all this shit.

As I'm thinking about all this for a second I don't notice a Benji walk up to the bench I'm sitting on. "Hey" he says. I look up a little surprised, "Hey.." he sits down next to me.

"We broke up.."

What did he just say..?

"Oh Benji I'm so sorry I never meant for any of this to-" he cuts me off.

"No! No.." there's a pause. "..I broke up with him..." he looks right into my eyes.

"Why..?"

"Somethings been off with us for a while.." I nod "he makes me feel bad a lot of the time.. about the stuff I like to do.. about.." he chuckles slightly "..being a romantic.. I wanna be with someone who doesn't make me feel anxious all the time.. someone who makes me feel like I can just... be myself, and that's enough.." we look at each other and I nod.

"That's how you make me feel Victor.."

I smile and look down. Those words lingering in my ears, "That's..." a pause "that's how you make me feel too.." I look back up at him, wishing I could kiss him, and I almost do as soon as he licks his lips. But then Mia walks out..

"Victor! I've been looking everywhere for you!" I look down and see I'm holding Benji's hand. I quickly let go before Mia sees, he looks disappointed but understanding.

Mia walks over to us and sits down next to me. "I should.. probably go.." says Benji. "No no.. wait" I say and put my hand on his arm as he stands up. He sits back down and looks at me and gives me a slight nod. I turn back to Mia. "Victor.. what's going on?" She asks suspiciously. "Mia.." I say and pause. "There's something I've been meaning to talk to you about for a while, I was going to tell you that night
we had sushi but then everything with Veronica and your dad.. I didn't want to make it worse..."

I take her hand, and she has a confused and also kinda scared look on her face. "I'm-..." I trail off and look back a Benji and he gives me another nod. I look down, my hands are shaking. Just then I remember all the fun times me and Mia had together, like that trashy art museum, but then I think of Benji, of his smile, his laugh, working with him, everything, and then I truly relize.. that I love Benji, and that's the thing that gave me the courage to say:"I.. I'm gay..." I almost don't look up at her scared to see her reaction, but I do anyway. She looks stunned and I'm holding back tears as she starts to cry.

"I'm so so sorry.. I should have told you when we met.. but I was so scared.. I had barely even admitted it to myself, I thought I could change.. I-I wanted to change. I thought I could just... be normal and make it work with you.. and I-I really wanted to I really did. But I-I... I couldn't.." I let go of her hand. "I-..." she trails off. "I know this is a lot but I hope you know I care about you so so so much" she nods. "I'm- I'm sorry I can't really proses this right now.." she says and looks down. "Yes of course... but let me know if your ever ready to talk about it.. and maybe with time we can be friends." I say.

She nods

"I'll let you go for now" another nod.

As soon as She's gone I turn back to Benji and burst into tears, I can't believe I just did that. He hugs me and whispers. "You did it.. I'm so proud of you" I nod into his chest and start to calm down a little bit, I let out a shaky breath. I close my eyes for a minute just leaning into Benji's embrace, he's so warm. I sit up and talk his hand, look deep into his eyes, I move closer to him, and just like that his lips are on mine. It was nothing like the kiss in the motel room, it wasn't dark and full of pain and regret, it was full of passion and love. As I lean into the kiss taking in any and every single moment of it I feel his hand in my hair and I do the same to him.

We pull apart and I'm blushing like crazy, and of course he is too. Benji's hand now grasping my suit jacket. I look down and back up and start laughing, soon enough Benji starts laughing too and then out of nowhere we are both in a laughing fit, and it's the best I've felt in weeks. As soon as we calm down I look back into his eyes and we share one more beautiful passionate kiss.

Ty for reading! Maybe give me some ideas for the next chapter :):