Overthinking

Not Thinking

“So I’ve never actually gotten around to hearing your story.” Fish said as he pulled me alongside him down the street back to my place. “I mean it’s been almost a month since we met and I’ve barely heard anything about you that I haven’t figured out on my own. So since you like to talk now…” The cool breeze blew through his wild blonde hair as he looked down at me.

I looked at my feet before I answered him quietly, “So I was adopted at two by my mom who was alone and unable to have children, and I’ve had Glossophobia since… as long as I can remember.” I looked at him to see his expression and it was annoyance thrown in with his signature grin. “What?” I asked defensively.

“Come on, there’s got to be more to it than that.” He said. I just shook my head at him, looking down at my feet again. I studied the way they move sloppily in small strides compared to Fish’s alongside mine. I hadn’t noticed before, but he had finally slowed down his walk to my speed. “How about this: Why hasn’t your mom met anyone?”

I shrugged. “I don’t really know. She’s just always been weird about men; she’s always saying how men are cheaters and liars and anyone who trusts a man cannot be trusted herself and all that crap.” I said before I started biting my lip. Fish scrunched his eyebrows in confusion for a moment before he just shrugged. “Okay next one. How many relationships have you ever been in in your life?” He asked with a mischievous grin.

That was an easy one. “None,” I said flatly.

“Really? No one? Ever? Come on. Okay, what about—“ He stopped abruptly when I stopped walking and curiously examined my surprised expression. He followed my gaze to my house ahead where my mother’s car was parked.

I exhaled deeply knowing that my walk with Fish was over. My mother would never let him even cone near the house. I pulled away from his hand and he suddenly understood what was going on. I shoved my hands in my pockets to fill the warmth that I had just lost.

“Can I still walk you to the house?” He asked curiously. I nodded and we resumed walking, but this time it was different, all of its charm lost. He shoved his hands in his pockets as well, and the walk seemed more like a death march where the malicious mother of anti-men-sylvania awaited.

As I predicted she popped out of the door right as we came upon it, a flash of pink slippers and Walmart brand maroon lipstick. “Who’s this?” she asked in her best disapproving tone before I had time to react to her presence.

Fish responded for me. “Fisher. Nice to meet you.” He put his hand out. She raised an eyebrow at it as if she expected it to do a trick for her. Fish pursed his lips and awkwardly and slowly shoved his hand into the recesses of his pocket. So we all stood there in silence for a moment before my mother flatly told me, “Tell him he can leave now… please.” She crossed her arms as she waited for me.

I looked up at him through my eyelashes and pursed my lips, hoping he would get the idea. He gave me a warm smile and turned to leave. “See you Monday.” He said under his breath before he fled down the front stairs and returned to the blank street with his long, fast strides.

My mother rolled her muddy brown eyes and slid back through the door. I followed her, trying to hide a small smile on my lips.

The second the door closed she pranced at me. “What was that, huh?” I just stared at my feet and let her vent. “Did you see that look in his? He only wants one thing from you and I will not stand for that, not today, not ever, you hear? He’s got you completely fooled with that dumb smile of his.” She exhaled sharply and pinched the bridge of her nose. “When I told you I wanted you to make friends I didn’t mean… that… him. I meant a good girl who will out you on the right path. He might start putting ideas into your head and…” she trailed off, shaking her head.

I didn’t see what the big deal was about, what the big deal was ever about. I knew two things then: that Fish was a good, smart person who would most definitely be good for me and that I had a throbbing headache growing fast in the back of my head. I rolled my eyes at her and headed for my room.

She called out to my back. “Start thinking about things before you do them, okay?”

Sure.