Love Can Suck My Soul Dick

Disappointment

"EIMAAN BLACK" Tonks calls out

"GET OUT OF BED YOU'RE GONNA BE LATE" Tonks continues to yell, I'm starting to hear the impatience in her voice

I sigh and check the alarm clock next to my bed, 730 am, 'It's not even late' I sigh to myself. I pick up my phone and head to Snapchat, I send my streaks, then text my mom, she was sick, but I think it's just a fever, still, my heartbeat rises, and I open the app I use when I'm about to have a panic attack. The thought appears in my head that I have to get ready for Hogwarts and to see Cedric and Madie, and I have to fix how I look.

I get out of bed and look in the mirror. I'm not that bad looking, darker skin that can be explained by my muggle mom, seeing as she is Pakistani, thick and wavy dark brown hair going just below my shoulders, I love everything about myself. Except for my eyes. It's the one thing I hate about myself. You can't get lost in them, they're poo brown and plain. I sigh at the thought of my ugly eyes, wishing I was a metamorphagus like Tonks.

I sigh and go to the bathroom to take a shower, I look at my body, I'm not skinny, but I'm not fat, I'm like a blob. "Even your body can't pick a side," I say to myself. After laughing at my joke, I curl my hair into loose and bouncy curls, then start putting on my outfit, black camo jeans, and a plain sage green t-shirt, with my black leather jacket as a statement piece.

The jacket was my dad, Regulus Black's. After he died, I had to start living with Nymphadora, but I see my mother on weekends. The jacket takes away attention from my eyes, so I try to wear it a lot. I put on my usual makeup, a little bit of concealer, heavy eyeliner, and black lipstick. No, I'm not that weird goth kid. I think goths are pretty cool, I just identify with the alt aesthetic, then again when I'm alone, I can look like a cool laid back big sister, wearing mom jeans and a t-shirt.

After heading downstairs I see Tonks and hug her. Tonks is everything I want to be, she's pretty, a metamorphagus, and badass, she doesn't take shit from anyone at all. She is a terrible mother figure when it comes to certain things like boys or helping me with my love life, and barely pesters me. Unless it's about being late. It's like her pet peeve, Tonks hated being off schedule.

"Em, you're gonna be late for the train" Tonks mutters annoyed. I check the time and see that it's 8 am. 'Shit' I think to myself.

I head downstairs and see Tonks sitting next to my bags unpacking and double-checking everything a million times.

"Tonks, I already checked" I laugh

"Mhm, I'm just making sure, make yourself breakfast Em," I laugh at that, maybe she isn't a terrible mother figure.

I head to the kitchen and I make myself scrambled eggs, and bacon, I burn myself frying the bacon but I use one of the plants from our garden and it goes away, I'm not a hundred percent sure what it's called. I'm pretty sure we learned it in herbology. While I'm trying to remember what it's called I grab orange juice and pour it into my cup. I sit on the breakfast table on my phone watching TikToks and eating. Eventually, I realize that it's 830, and Cedric and Madie aren't here to pick me up.

"Tonks, How far are Ced and Madie?" I yell out.

"They aren't taking you, sweetheart, Ced had to pick up his parent's friends kid, and madie caught a ride with Cho Chang, would you mind using the floo network?"

Who's this kid? I wonder if they're cool, I wouldn't mind a new friend.

"Oh, ok I'll go by floo, it's fine Tonks," I say with disappointment in my voice, I'm not mad that I'm going by floo, I'm more upset Cedric wasn't picking me up, 'less time with him and Madie' i sigh.

Madie is my best friend, her brother, Cedric is the one guy I can't get over, I've had this stupid crush since the second year. Now I'm in fourth-year friends with Madie, who's a third year, and no, I'm not shallow, I'm not friends with Madie to be closer to Cedric, I love Madie to death, she and I became friends last year when I found her crying in Moaning Myrtle's bathroom, I still don't know why she was crying, but now we're best friends, I try and ignore the fact I have a huge crush on her brother most of the time, but the fact that he looks at me like a little sister, is the most aggravating feeling, I just write in my diary when I feel like I'm going to break.

My diary, this was something my mom got me for my 12th birthday, it has everything I've ever thought in there. If I ever lost it, I would murder myself.

I walk over to Tonks and she tells me "done." with an accomplished look. Laughing at how happy she looks I grab diary and put it in my bag, my wand, Which was 14 inches, using oak wood and a unicorn hair core, and my phone.

We walk to the fireplace, Tonks smiles at me and starts her lecture. Every year she says the same things over and over.

"Be safe, don't get hurt, take care of yourself, take your anxiety meds once a week, smile, make more friends, don't hurt yourself..." it went on for an hour when She finally said something that peaked my interest

"Oh yeah, and this year DO NOT join the Triwizard Tournament"

"The what?" I ask with a blank look.

"Triwizard Tournament, Dumbledore will explain, but you are not allowed to join. Understood?"

I know Nymphadora would freak out if I did enter so I told her "I promise I won't join the stupid tournament, Nymphadora" I smirk knowing that she hates being called Nymphadora

"Thank you.... AND DONT CALL ME NYMPHADORA" she yells.

I laugh grab the floo powder "PLATFORM NINE AND THREE QUARTERS" I yell as I drop the powder and after feeling the gut-wrenching pain and the weird sensation of twisting and turning. I finally show up at the platform, and I feel at ease, seeing the familiar train station.