Avengers Imagines & Preferences

A Monster - Loki x Reader

Loki Laufeyson x Y/N Y/L/N
Warnings: Angst, lots and lots of angst
Word Count: About 1100 Words
Key: y/f/b - your favorite book
b/f/n - best friend's name
Requested by Aarmau247
Italics are flashbacks

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You and Loki had been best friends ever since Thor brought him to the compound after the whole "Battle of New York." You two got along very well, always pulling pranks, sneaking off to the private library he'd hidden in the Tower, and making sarcastic remarks whenever you could. You guys were inseparable, which is why everyone was surprised when your dynamic was suddenly non-existent. 

You guys had recently had a big fight. After being friends for so long, you slowly found yourself falling for Loki, and you confessed it in the worst way possible. 

"Hey, y/n, wanna go to the library?" Loki asked you.

"Of course! Let's go." You replied eagerly, taking his hand in yours and running outside. 

The two of you ran through the tree (imagine the way to the Hogwarts Express except it's a tree) and into the library, which you had proudly decorated with green fairy lights to match the golden bookcases. You grabbed (y/f/b) off of the shelf while Loki grabbed his journal to do some drawing (because I feel like that would totally be a thing). As you were reading, Loki heard your thoughts growing louder. This usually meant you were at your favorite part of the book. He chuckled slightly to himself.

You heard him and felt your heart melt. You snuck a quick glance at him and saw the small smile on his face, the one Thor said hadn't been seen since he and Loki were children. You couldn't help but think about how to tell Loki how you felt, you knew you couldn't keep it from him much longer. You turned your attention back to your book as Loki's head snapped up. 

"What the heck?" He whispered.

"What's wrong?" You asked, concerned. 

"Your thoughts are very loud. Is it true?"

Your breathing stopped for a second. "Is what true?"

"Don't play games with me Y/N! You just said you loved me!" 

"Yeah, I do! And I didn't tell you because I didn't want this to happen!" 

"Why? Why do you love me? After all I've done? Do you just want the satisfaction of knowing you befriended the monster parents tell their kids about at night?" He yelled. 

"No! I love you because it's you! You're amazing! You deserve someone!" You shouted back at him, tears stinging your eyes. 

"I don't deserve to be loved." He said, barely above a whisper. 

You left the secret library, unsure of what to do next. How dare he read your thoughts? Why was he mad? You guys would say "love ya" as friends, but everyone knows adding the "I" makes things a lot more serious, and a lot more complicated. You weren't sure what to do, but one thing was for sure, things between you and Loki wouldn't ever be the same. 

---time skip brought to you by tony helping you with your dresses---

It was time for another one of Stark's parties. You and Loki usually stuck together during these events, but, you know. You ended up bringing (b/f/n) to the party, the two of you matching the fire and ice theme. You were in a black dress/suit that had artificial flames at the bottom of it (like in Hunger Games) and (b/f/n) was wearing a pale blue dress/suit with snowflakes dancing around his/her/their head. Everyone stopped to stare at the two of you as you entered the large ballroom. 

(B/f/n) went over to chat with Bucky, whom he/she/they had a MAJOR crush on, and you went over to the bar. 

"One Shirley Temple please." You asked Natasha, who was taking her usual role as an unofficial bartender. (Shirley Temples are basically Sprite and something called grenadine syrup with a cherry on top)

"Why aren't you with Loki tonight?" She asked, obviously a little worried.

"He found out. And he was mad." You told her. Nat was the only one on the team you'd told about your little crush on Loki. 

"How?"

"He said my 'thoughts were loud'. Apparently, he can read minds." 

"That scumbag. I'm gonna-" You held her back, seeing as her hand was on her pocket knife and her eyes were shooting daggers in Loki's direction. 

"It's fine, Nat. Leave him alone."

Loki's POV

"What's wrong brother? Something happen between you and y/n?" Thor asked Loki, who had been more distant than usual that night. 

"What do you do when someone loves you, but you don't want to hurt them?" Loki asked his brother, silently cursing himself for asking. 

"I assume you mean Lady/Lord y/n?"

"Y-yes."

"You love him/her/them brother. I can see it in your eyes. Hold on to him/her/them and never let go, before it's too late. And before Lady Romanoff slices your throat." He pointed to where you were trying to hold off Natasha. 

---time skip brought to you by the science bros---

The party was uneventful, at least for you. (B/f/n) had some exciting news. 

"Guess who has a date with a certain steel-blue-eyed super soldier?" he/she/they proudly told you. 

"Let me guess, Natasha? I totally ship it." You asked sarcastically. He/She/They didn't get it. 

"No. Me!"

"You're so naive sometimes. Come on, it's late, you're staying here. There's a spare room on my floor."

After getting (b/f/n) settled, you went over to the balcony and stared at the stars. 

"Hello, y/n." You heard Loki say behind you.

"Laufeyson." You replied, little emotion in your voice. 

"I understand you're upset..."

"Oh no, how could I be upset? You simply read my mind then yelled at me for what you figured out, even though I was thinking about how to tell you." 

"That's not fair. Look y/n, I'm a monster, and you deserve better than that."

"Shouldn't I have a say in what I deserve, Loki?"

"NOT WHEN IT'S ME! NOT WHEN YOU'RE SAYING YOU'RE IN LOVE WITH ME!"

"YOU KNOW YOU COULD'VE JUST TOLD ME YOU DIDN'T FEEL THE SAME WAY! IT'S OKAY! YOU DON'T HAVE TO FEEL THE SAME! BUT YOU DON'T GET TO USE THE 'MONSTER' CARD AS AN EXCUSE TO BE A LOWDOWN, NO GOOD, UGGHHH! I CAN'T DO THIS ANYMORE! IF YOU WANT TO BELIEVE YOU'RE A MONSTER, FINE!" You screamed at him. You walked away and locked yourself in your room. 

Maybe he was a monster. Maybe love made you blind. 

---//---//---

When someone requested a Loki x Reader angst story I knew exactly what prompt I wanted to use. I hope you liked this, there might be a part 2😏? Let me know if you want that. As always, stay safe, and remember, mental health comes first!

-Zoe