Love in Silence

Love You in Silence

I love quietly....
How do I talk about this?
It's all my fault, I am a coward.
Just watching you giggle.
The world suddenly became so quiet.
Just the sound of the heartbeat.
That I was determined to love you.
Right now, you're the only one.
The world suddenly became so quiet.
Dare not breathe hard.
Because I'm afraid it's a dream.
Accidentally wakes up
Most want to see is your smile
In my eyes you are the best.
You wouldn't know.
I love quietly....

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My feeling restless this couple day
The feeling of emptiness consume all my brain cell, I just can't wait to see his face, his giigle, his cute understanding in silent....

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I don't know when this started to be like this, when our friend ship is not enough anymore...

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First time I meet him I think he is quite guys, reserved and calm, but his eyes reminding me to the eyes of a cute little animals.

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Since that first impression, my eyes start to tracking wherever he goes, like he have a magnetic power over me, I find his movements is cute and adorable, the way he just obedient no matter what they tell him, ahhhh... Sooo ... Cute guys I have for partner, this gonna be fun project, I thought that time.

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My easy going personality make him more relax around me, and he start to attached to me, and always giggle no matter he looking at me, and I love to make fun to him, the way he just giggle is way too cute! And I love to tease him! His reaction when I tease him is so interesting, he never mad, just giggle and make that cute voice of him.

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It's easy to develop feeling over this cute guys, I don't really have to take too much effort to go deep into my character.

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This character did I have to role is have secret crush for his friend for ten years, hahahha That way too much and too long? Ten years keep a secret crush over your rivals? Yes, I think this not going to be easy, but now, after I see my partner, I feel I really can role this character, he is adorable, so it's just feel like you had to acting you love an adorable creatures... And how hard is it??? Every body can do that, right? Because he just adorable, you don't need to 'act' you just need to naturally fall in love with him.

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But!!!! Arrggghhhh... His role character is annoying!!! So different with his true personality!! His real him is so adorable, while his role is so arrogant and narsistic!! But I must admitted his acting skill is great, because every time he jump to his role his gesture will change suddenly! But every time 'Cut' is heard he will instantly back to his cute personality... Hahha I like this cute person!

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Yeah!!! Now all of that tease and through I have had backfire to me!!! Right now I just can't get him out of my head!! I just want to see him, touch him, hugging his small waist, pinch his chin kissing his soft check and that lovely lips, and pinch his perfect nose! I thought this the feeling you have when you miss your cute pet at home??! missing them and want to hug them!!!

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But !!! But!!! That not the case anymore! I think I just fall to deep!! This make me crazy and scared!! I'm scared he don't think the same with me, but more importantly I'm scared to admitted that I'm become a gay, I'm scared that this obsessed I have over him, will make my career over in vain! I scared that we don't have any future together! I'm scared that I will ruin his career and future!

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God.... I never been a person who got depressed easily because of something like love sick, but what is this? I can't eat well, I can't sleep well, I lose weight on Chinese New year's? While everyone else should gain weight, even my Yu look a little 'pang' hahhaha look at his chubby cheeks... Hahahahha Yu is actually so skinny, that's why it's easy to embracing his waist... So small... Arrggghhhh.... What I have thinking? I almost can't resist my self while we were at ig live yesterday.... He look so cute when he lift his head to back, I got temptation to lick his chin, and look at that perfect nose.... Arggghhh.... I really got obsessed over him!!! I can be a psyco if this goes on!!! What should I do then?? I feel like I'm not my own self lately, the me who always kidding and easy going, but now I really depressed over my wife, and this 'wife' I keep, is keeping draw so much intention because of his cuteness!!! Did one day some one else going to take him away from me?? No!!! No!!! I don't want it, I love him! Yes me Sam love his Yu, I know it!! Is not shi de's feeling, coz the one who looks so cute is never be shu yi, is Yu, God's he so cute!! I just want to abducted him and keep him and locked him on my room!!!

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Some tell me what I should do, to make my head straight?? How to lose this obsession? What I have to do? Even I said I love him, he will take it lightly and said he love me too, he just going to take my feeling lightly like fans service or friends love, while me.... This 'Love' I keep for him inside my heart is never that kind of love!! This Love that make me doesn't have good sleep for day's, this love that's make me want to eat him alive!! Arrggghhhh... I want to hold him again... Want to feel his soft skin under my caress, I want to hear his cute accent, and his soft voice, want to embrace him... Kissing him again and again.... Did I'm going to be crazy?? What I should do?? How I keep this erupted flow of my own feeling?? How do I had to do to make it just go away?? It's hard to let it go!!! It's harder because I not even tell him yet, I was to cowards!!! How I have to do to talk about this?

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So I just love him quietly.... Love him in silence... Follow his movements in shadow.... And keep this feeling I got deep inside my heart....

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Yeah that's I have to do, right?? Don't make any fuss over this feeling, and ruin our career life!! Yes! Yes! I have to keep it deep deep inside, so no one will know it! Act normally like all my effection is just a fan's service, just for our job, yes!! That should to do, so no one will ever know it, it's all just a scenario!! So do I, I just have to 'act' yes 'act' like I love him falsely, fake my own 'real' feeling, smile while I was bleeding inside... Tell him 'I love him' as a fake confession... Aaahhhhh.... God's this pain...  Every time I said that word, it's so painful.... the cry of my deepest heart.... I Love You..... Yu....

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Hi... Guys.... I got my new interest to this SamYu couple lately, and got an idea after watch this ive ig that they make, hahhaha
This Yang Yu Tang is very adorable in his every movement, like a child...
So hope you enjoy it, like always, I don't have any plot and this just spontaneous idea I had, and I planing this ff will be short, hahaha so let's see are this stupid head of mine can make something interesting or just a crap

Regards,

D

The ig live I talking about...
Thanks to Koilicious Bl Garden, for dedicated make this eng subs about them❤️❤️
And....

The song that inspired this chapter because it's just like Sam deepest confessions...
Hahahhah....
Enjoy..