life - a series of poems

tired.

i'm exhausted.

it's not that i'm not sleeping,

it's not that i'm taking too many naps.

i'm so, so tired of living.

every day is an endless cycle of working, studying, crying, stressing, and thinking.

it's the same thing every day.

why am i doing this?

what's the point?

i'll have good grades. a perfect resume. i'll go to a good college. i'll go to med school. i'll get a job. 

but the work will never stop.

i tell myself that i'm working hard now so i can play in the future,

but youth isn't forever.

i won't be young anymore.

i won't be able to do the things i'm losing right now.

but i can't.

i'm missing out on everything.

everything i want to do

everywhere i want to go

everything i want to see

everything i want to smell

everything i want to taste

everything i want to touch

i won't be able to do experience any of them.

so why am i working so hard?

crying, ripping my hair out, picking my skin off, having a panic attack whenever i get something lower than an a?

the work will never stop.

the stress will never stop.

i can't see the end.

we all die anyway.

why can't i do what i want to do?

why can't i be free?

i just want to be free.

i just want to be free.

please.

i'm so tired.

i don't know how much longer i can do this.

i'm about to break.