Our Plan {narry}

Chapter 40: Til I See You Again

                

              

      I didnt know what to think.

     Does this count as cheating?

    That feeling in my stomach was back.

 I had known there had been this odd feeling in my stomach yesterday when Harry and had talked. And I had felt it again later, when I had texted John. And now, it was like this feeling of anticipation had appeared, and I hadn't the slightest clue why. Harry and I were friends, and I needed to accept that. I just didn't understand why it was so difficult.

Harry and I hadn't't really said much. We had just enjoyed each others company, each of us in our own little world. After that, I hadn't really wanted to talk much. So I tried to just stay in my own space, which somehow ended with me texting John.

It wasn't that I really wanted to text him. It was that I felt that I needed to. I wasn't sure why, I mean there was no label here. It was one kiss, that was it. It just happened to be a kiss I liked very much. It wasn't like this was a three year relationship or something. It wasn't like he proposed. So then there was really no excuse as to why I was thinking about John. And there was really no excuse to be thinking about Harry. It was weird really, I kinda felt like I was seventeen or something. I was too old to be thinking this way. They were both nice guys. Harry and I had been through more together, but we had also made mistakes, and I was sure if I was ready to look past that just yet. And John. He was an absolute sweetheart, who seemed completely genuine, and more importantly wasn't fazed by the whole 'fame' thing. So then I wasn't sure why I just kept thinking about it over and over like this. It should be obvious. I needed to spend more time with John, and see where that took me. And I had excepted that, up until yesterday.

I reached out, picking my phone up off the nightstand stood next to me. The bright light of my phone lit up the portion of the dark room, and I buried myself under the covers just a bit more. Liam had been out with Zayn for over an hour now and there had been something that I realized was bothering me quite a bit. And something needed to be done about it.

I scrolled through my contacts, landing on John's fresh one. My thumb hovered over the call button as I realized my heart was beating faster than it shouldve been. I smiled, just a little bit, and pressed call. I stared at the connecting screen, waiting for John's face to appear. As I wanted, I looked at myself, wondering if it was too dark in here to actually FaceTime him. But before I even had time to decide, his face appeared, startling me just a bit. And all I could do was stare at him.

His chest was bare, a thin chain hanging off his neck. He had more chest hair than I imagined, but that wasn't saying I was complaining about it. And again, all I could do was look. He smiled at me, and for the first time I noticed the slight gap in his teeth.

"Hey stranger," I laughed, turning the brightness up a bit on my phone. He smiled wider, clicking a lamp on that I guessed was say beside his bed. He sat up, pressing his back against the headboard of his bed as he pulled the cover up to his neck.

"Sorry," He winked, "You caught me in a bit of an odd time," I immediately felt stupid, and before I could even think I was opening my mouth.

"Shit sorry. I can call back?" I trailed off. He shook his head quickly, brushing me off.

'Nah mate. It's fine. What're you up to?" I glanced down, wondering how I was going to bring this up without either sounding like a clingy freak or a complete idiot. So, I just spit it out before I had the chance to do what I did best. Over think things.