warm honey ▸ poetry

78 intrusive thoughts

[ trigger warning. ]
no author on duty,
read at your own risk.

intrusive thoughts
repulsive
abnormal
physically and mentally in pain
outcasted
want to succumb
they tell me to do it
do it
do it
do it
they whisper
do it
DO IT
set yourself on fire
fuck your brother
fuck your dad
maybe your uncle even
suffocate your sister
better yet
kill her
kill yourself so they feel bad for wronging you
revenge suicide is best served brutally cold
scream something insensitive, a slur maybe
swerve into oncoming traffic
drive with your eyes closed
but i don't
i don't
i'd never
i hold out
in hopes that i remember
intrusive thoughts
reflect your fears
not your desires