Forbidden Love, Doomed from the Start {Frerard}

{Saturday}

Gerard and Frank. Best friends. Some would even say that they had a bond that went further than that.

It was a day like any other. Frank picked up Gerard in his Chevrolet and they headed off to RidgeValley High. Gerard looked at Frank intently. Something was different, but he couldn't quite figure out what

Gerard has been watching him closely a lot recently. Started noticing things he never noticed before. Like the way his heart thumped around him, the way when their fingers brushed each others as Frank handed him a pencil at school made him weak in the knees, the way when their eyes met he felt like if he didn't gasp for air, the air would never reach his lungs.

It could never mean anything though. Not in this day in age. Like a forbidden love doomed from the start, like a shaken coke ready to explode. So Gerard sighed and rested his head against the window, this could never be anything.

"What's up Gerard, you good? You look like you haven't been laid in a while" Frank meant it in a jokingly way hoping to get a chuckle out of his friend, but instead was met with a tense Gerard. Gerard didn't want to think about that, not right now. The shame was enough to make him want to hurl.

That further worried Frank. He knew he was terrible when it came to words, but for Gerard he'd do anything to make his best friend smile. Even if it meant getting out of his comfort zone to make Gerard feel better he'd do it because Gerard meant the world to him, he was his soulmate. Platonically of course for it couldn't mean anything else.

Frank Iero and Gerard Way two pitiful souls. The saying "Right place, wrong time" would be best to describe what mess they had going on. They were meant for each other both promising their innerbeings to one another yet being held back. It was too shameful to face the scrutiny, that is. Therefore, making them linked to their internal voices the strongest obstacle of all.

"For real man, are you good?" Gerard just stared at his shoes and nodded. What can he possibly say? That he was possibly in love with him and that he was a big ole' homo? No it's ridiculous.

"Yes everything's good, just nervous for your big game this week." He tried pulling off a forced grin as best as he could, trying not to meet Frank's eyes. Frank shrugged it off. Too many thoughts in his own head to really notice something else was wrong.

Gerard watches as Frank departs from their little group consisting of five, and walks over to the locker of his girlfriend Susanne. Susanne was a nice friendly girl. She was your average pretty-petite perfect, picket white fence girl. More than deserving for the captain of the football team, yet Gerard couldn't help but feel his blood boil at the sight of her. He knew why though because she was his.

--

Susanne. The girl of everyone's dreams. What more could you want from a girl? Is what Frank always thought of her.

So it was only natural that he would go after her. She was more achievable, he wouldn't get shunned for admitting his love to her. She was what Frank needed. Well him and his father in a way.

See, trying to maintain the perfect apple pie American family was harder than people believed. As the second eldest Frank was expected to follow in his perfect brother's footsteps. Which included a perfect girlfriend that he'd fall in love with and dream of having a family with, after he became a doctor or something first though of course.

Frank hated it. He hated the expectations. He had to be perfect, not even an inch out of line. He was stuck. Trying to wipe the fog off the window while it was on the other side. Most of all he hated football, but he could never admit that to anyone. Well except Gerard of course.

Either way Frank followed in his brother's footsteps and tried to shoot his shot with Susanne. He started slowly getting close with her of course. Making her laugh at his dumb stories, walking to class with her, holding her books. Until one day it happened.

Frank was walking her to class when he blurted it out. "Susanne I think I like you" Susanne stopped in her tracks. Sure many guys had confessed to her but this time it was Frank. So with red dusting her cheeks she said the words Frank wanted to hear most.

Yet also the words Gerard wished never to hear. He knew it was going to happen and he knew what was coming next. The goodbye kisses on the cheeks, the hands linked together as they walked the halls, and the casual trifling at their lockers. It all made Gerard sick to his stomach.

Which led to the shameful weekend. The weekend he wished to forget. The weekend that only made everything worse. All because of that poster in the ally.

Gerard's father wasn't what you could call the ideal father. Widowed only when Gerard was eleven and Mikey was seven. Everything became too much for him, so he found comfort in booze and bars. Out most nights more than not. Leaving Gerard alone most of the time taking care of not only himself and brother, but his father as well.

So when Gerard was ordered to go to the liquor store to get more booze, he did just that. Of course that Saturday night was the one night when he decided to take the back ally's for a shortcut, when a certain poster caught his eye. It was a poster for one of those gay bars on the outskirts of town.

He knew he shouldn't, no, couldn't. It was wrong, everything hes gone against, everything he suppressed. Still there was something in the back of his head telling him to give in. Maybe it was because of everything that happened that week. Maybe he just wanted to forget, because he somehow found himself on the outskirts of town just a few paces away from that bar.

Everything in his body kept screaming stop. As he walked in, stop. As he sat down, stop. As he made eye contact with the boy across the room who seemed the same age, stop. As they sat down together, stop. As they walked in the bathroom together, stop. As their lips locked, stop. As the boy tugged on his waistband, stop. As the boy sinked to his knees, stop. As they walk out the bathroom, stop.

Only when he walks out and down an ally, does the voice stop. As he slides down the brick wall and stares at his hands. He wanted to hate it, he wanted to feel disgusted, but he felt something else instead.

---

Which leads to now, why Gerard feels so off. Why Frank senses something wrong. Why Gerard turns his head as Frank walks up to his girlfriend. Why he looks down at his hands and clenches them. Why he curses his mind as he remembers that Saturday night.

Most of all why Gerard bites his lip as he realizes, hes fallen for his best friend.

AN~ 

J- Uhh hey if you read anything on our account you probably already know that this is a joint account, in which my friend and I have written whatever this is. So I hope you enjoy this story I think it's going pretty well so far <3

E- Tbh most things i write i think theyre actually bad but im actually kinda proud of how this chapter are story is going. make sure to vote, besties