Forbidden Love, Doomed from the Start {Frerard}

{Honest Lies}

Gerard shifts uncomfortably in his seat. Sitting right across from him was Susanne with Frank's arm around her. Gerard had to tear his eyes off of them as they sat down. He didn't like this one bit.

It's not like Frank and him sat alone together. They were always surrounded by some sort of group, but this was different. Perhaps it was because she was a girl. More specifically, Frank's girl. Or perhaps, it was because of this morning's discovery. Either way he had a bad feeling.

The lunch as a whole wasn't that great, in other words it was awkward. Gerard sat with his head down as Frank and Susanne tried to make conversation. Eventually they gave up and Frank just assumed it had to do with whatever was wrong this morning in the car.

Still, Frank couldn't help but push to figure out what was wrong with Gerard. So when the lunch bell rang, he said goodbye to Susanne and caught up to Gerard who was already leaving the lunchroom. "Hey, is everything good, man?" Gerard didn't hear him though, or did but was ignoring him.

So Frank grabbed Gerard's wrists to stop him. Which made Gerard roughly pull his arm away from Frank's grip, and turn to face him." Oh hey Frank, didn't see you there" Gerard said with a nervous chuckle.

"Are you okay? You've been acting weird all day." Gerard glanced down at his feet. Surely he couldn't have looked that off today. Maybe hes been trying too hard to avoid Frank. How can he lie to him now though? Frank will see right through him.

Frank clears his throat waiting for an answer. "Nothing's wrong, I'm just tired. Mikey needed help with homework so I stayed up all night helping" Frank narrowed his eyes at him. He didn't seem all convinced, and Gerard could tell.

"Oh really? Are you sure that's all? Come on we're best friends be honest" Gerard gulped nervously. He knew his lie wouldn't work, but what else could he say? Frank knows him too well, and would see right through him.

"I promise I'm telling the truth. Look, I have to get to class. So I'll talk to you later" Frank watched as Gerard walked off. There's obviously something else, but when Gerard wants to tell him he'll tell him. So for now he'll stop prying.

For the first time in a while Gerard wasn't ready to leave school, because he knew what was waiting in the car. There's no way Frank believed him. So of course he was going to ask more questions. At least that's what he thought, but when Gerard sat down in the car Frank just smiled at him and drove out of the parking lot.

This was usually Gerard's favorite part of the day. His random thoughts would be released into the air, and comforted with Frank's own filling up the dull day. Right now though the air was thick and uncomfortable. Just as Gerard was about to turn the radio on to fill the silence Frank opened his mouth.

"So, are we picking up Mikey?" Frank turns toward Gerard, and Gerard lets out a breath he didn't know he was holding. Gerard didn't know why he was so nervous. Yet he still felt like he'd rather take the bus home then be here.

"Uh, yeah sure" Frank nods and looks back forward. At least with Mikey there it would be less awkward. As Frank pulls into the middle school to pick up Mikey his mouth opens, and he blurts what's been on his mind this whole time.

"Did I do something wrong, Gerard?" Gerard gets startled at Frank's sudden question. How could he answer it? Technically Frank is a part of the problem, but it's not really his fault.

"What? No. I mean, not really. It's not your fault is what I mean." Frank just looks at him confused with a raised brow, what's that supposed to mean?

"I don't understand?" Gerard sighs, he can't think of a way to explain this. He looks back at Frank who's looking at him with questioning eyes. Before Gerard even gets a chance to open his mouth the backseat door opens and Mikey gets in.

"Hey Gerard, hey Frank." Mikey says while putting his backpack on the seat next to him. With that the tension in the air dissipated, and Frank waved to him before pulling out of the parking lot.

For the rest of the ride Mikey talks about his day at school, filling the previous silence. Meanwhile Gerard nods and makes a humming noise every now and then to show he's listening. After a while Gerard looks back and notices Franks knuckles turning white because of how hard he gripping the steering wheel, which Gerard remembers he does when he gets nervous.

Gerard wants to take Frank's hand in his own, and sooth his nervousness. He knows he shouldn't though. Frank would probably hate it. God what would he think, how can he tell Frank the truth? Frank would probably look at him in disgust if he knew what Gerard had done.

Frank shakes his shoulder pulling him out of his thoughts, and he looks up to see his and Mikey's house. Gerard says a quick thank you without looking Frank in the eyes and heads inside with Mikey.

Gerard notes his dad's car isn't in the driveway, and his thoughts are confirmed when he's inside where his dad is nowhere to be found. Out drunk in some bar he supposes as he sets down his bag in the living room and heads to the kitchen. Gerard opens the pantry and searches for a snack, settling on some pretzels.

By the time Gerard gets back to the living room Mikey's already in his own room probably doing homework. So that means Gerard is alone with his own thoughts. Great.

With no homework or much of anything to do Gerard also heads to his room and flops down on his bed. He rolls around onto his back, looking up to the ceiling. His thoughts immediately go to thinking about what Frank would think of him if he knew what he'd done that Saturday. Let alone of how Gerard felt about him.

How could Gerard possibly tell Frank now. No matter how hard Gerard thought everything pointed to this ending terribly. Frank and Gerard were as one would say best buds. As far as Gerard knew, Frank was painfully straight dating a really nice girl. Why would he want to date Gerard?

Hell why does Gerard even want to date Frank. He can't be gay. For as long as he could remember his own father reinforced the idea that he could never be gay. Then again why should Gerard listen to his drunk of a father? All he ever taught him was how to sneak expensive liquor in his coat.

Yeah maybe Gerard could come to terms with this. It couldn't go that bad. So Gerard fell asleep with thoughts of Frank lingering in his mind.