Dear God
Tell me why you want me to give you my life when I try and it flees? Tell me why I should wake up when the enemy steals the joy from me? Tell me why my life is Barron? Why can't you provide? What's your excuse God? What's it today? Why can't you provide a job one that doesn't degrade my being?, How are you Strong?, how am I the head and not the tail?, when it seems like I have no purpose!? How can I change my self and my life?, how can I find purpose?
Where are you God? Help me! Yet am I writing to No One? Is it true someone thought in me. Where are you? I am your creation and you let demons get in the way of us! I am foolish so heal me? I am not evil so why do you abandon me?, Why do you cast me to the bottom while the wicked eat on top? What have I done that is so significant that I must get disrespected in toil everyday and no matter how hard I try to flee from it, the toil, The pain it finds its way to me, slapping me in the face reminding me of my insignificance, so what can I do? Can I rise? Do I rise once more? Even when my eyes are casted away from me what must I do?, when I can't see? Can I die? It seems that death is merely my destiny and since you don't show your being maybe I will find ease in taking my being, I already know how the story ends so why must I go on? It's meaningless Toil God, My life is A curse, my dreams are slipping from my hands with every moment I'm awake, I am reminded everyday that my life is Not a dream come true but more over the Thoughts, The worthless thoughts of the enemy and his mind Games, I am the enemies bitch just how the men think I am there bitch as well so why am I designed to merely just be Someone's Bitch who is bound to death all because the men have fucked up everything so bad because they can't find satisfaction in anything but fucking things up and what's worse God, is you created these "Fuck" Monsters yet you want me to stay here! You want lil old Savannah to Sing Cumbia To all the sinners while I get beat!? I'm a toy a being to be played with! It would be absolutely redundant to not understand the Need for suicide in my life and how suicide equates to Freedom! Why am I crazy God? You know what's Crazy Christ!, The fact that I have to give up my miserable Life To Someone Who can't even Speak!
Aghhhhh, My mind, it is infested with Demons! I can't handle the Lies! What is truth Christ?
God:Surrender.,If it's So terrible, If your life seems meaningless then kill that Demon inside of you!, Come to me and I will give you rest.
YOU ARE READING
Everyone Screams To Things Unseen
Non-FictionThe diary of a woman struggling to navigate clearly through life in 21st century America as the lines between the natural and spiritual world become blurred.
