Uncertainty // z.m.

Nine

________________ London, 11.11.13 MON

Dear friend, 

I figured out why Zayn is acting so considerate and nice towards me. And I'm quite pissed, may I say so. While I was thinking he might fancy me and I could somehow use this to my own advantage, he was making plans behind my back!

How would you react if you came to know that someone is thinking about using you to get hold of a good deal? Well, I really don't like that idea and I did my best to show him what I think about his plans. He was planning to use me to impress some guy he wants to make a deal with, how disgusting is that?!

And by using to impress I mean that he wanted me to "accompany" him for a dinner with that man and show a little interest in him, like he put it. I refused straight away. I might work for him, because I'm forced to, but my work does not include being a hooker, no. I refuse that. If there's one thing in my life I would never want to lose, it's probably my honour. 

And you know what? That'a exactly what I told Zayn right in his goddamned beautiful face. He didn't even flinch, just looked at me and finally, smiled. You can imagine that I grew even angrier at that gesture and in my uncontrollable rage, I even attempted to slap him. He, however, caught my hand in the air and held me tight. "I respect your opinion and I like your sense of pride, but I didn't want you to hook up with him. Only to smile, bat your lashes and maybe bite your lip to make his blood boil. I'm sure both of us know that men become irresponsible when aroused, it's only a little psycho game I need you for. Please." He whispered, seeing that there were also some other people in the vast room. 

I'm still angry, but I don't know what to think about it. I don't believe that it will be that easy, if so, he would have paid a woman to accompany him and do what he wanted her to do. Ugh! I'm on the best way to go insane.