The Stone Wall and His Weakness [A.H.]

XXI

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"Okay, what did you want to talk about?" Aaron shut the door gently behind him, dropping his keys onto the side table and slipping off his shoes. He stared at me expectantly, his shoulders tense.

"Why don't, um..." I sighed, sitting on the armrest of the couch, "Why don't you sit down?"

"Why don't you just tell me what's going on, Alex?" He ran a hand down his face, slipping off his suit jacket and throwing it onto a chair by the dining table.

"You're tired."

"Yeah, it's been a long day." He sighs heavily, staring at me as his frustration builds.

"'m sorry, you should go to bed, we can talk in the morning."

"Or, you could just tell me what's going on." He crossed his arms and I looked down at my hands in my laps, picking at some dirt under my nails.

"After Savannah had Hank, we never really got the chance to talk about, well, kids..." I glanced up at Aaron, his eyebrows ticking down in frustration.

"Kids? That's what this is about? Alex, it's okay, we have time." He took a step forward, lifting my head up with his forefinger, gently running his thumb over my chin.

"Well, that's the thing, um... I don't. Have time, that is." My eyes darted around the room before settling on his crooked tie. I reached up to loosen it, seeing as there was no point in wearing it any longer, "I had a baby. Well, not really. It was right after college and I was getting ready to go into the academy. I got sick, then sicker, and by the time I got to the doctor, it was too late."

I pulled the tie off from around his neck, slowly rolling it up. His hands fell to his sides, his right index and middle fingers rubbing slowly against his thumb.

"What are you saying, Alex?"

"I was pregnant. I didn't know, it was too early to know, and by the time I found out, it was too late." I fiddled with the tie in my hands, the blue silk smooth against my fingers, "The doctor, she said I had a, uh... A hostile uterus." I let out a choked laugh at this, blinking back the tears that threatened to spill, "She said that chances of me having a baby are slim, that there would be a lot of complications."

I bit the inside of my cheek, throwing the tie across the room towards the dining table, "So no, Aaron, we don't have time."

"You never told me that." He moved around me to sit on the couch, his hands clasped in his lap. I turned around, pulling my knees to my chest, "Why didn't you tell me that?" He looked at me, a sad look in his eyes.