Phoenix of Dawn

Don't Look Down

Caffeine first, then Claira.

Caffeine.

Caffeine. Claira.

I made my way through the halls all the  while stifling yawn after yawn as they kept coming over and over. My goals for the day were simple: Caffeine, visit Claira, and train because I hadn't done that in what felt like ages. Maybe after I'd find some way to blow off steam but today I needed to put my work in. Perhaps I'd hunt down the leader of the base and introduce myself. It was odd they hadn't made themselves known yet but if Axel's words were true last night they may be more interested in watching me than interacting with me. 

After seven years out of Draco I'd stopped wondering if my loyalty was questioned among those who still had faith in the balance. Sure I'd been kidnapped and trained against my will but the effects of that time spent under Ky's thumb made me a giant ass question mark. Why wouldn't they want to keep detailed tabs on a killing machine that may or may not be on their side. How could I blame them? I'd do the same if I were in their shoes. 

 Even still, I should try to introduce myself. Keeping myself isolated would only increase suspicions rising against me and as much as I wanted to defy every word Axel says, I knew he was right. Associating closely with him would only hinder my attempts to be trusted.  

If I wanted to be anything more than a questionable asset then I'd have to start making strides to prove I could be trusted. 

That meant learning how to socialize which was another goal of mine for the day; attempt to make at least one friend.  The easiest target for this mission was Bex, she was already desperate to get me to like her. 

I stepped into the hall and made a beeline for the back where the breakfast foods were laid out along with coffee. Mug in hand I set out to accomplish the first of my goals. Maybe the doctors would have some new information about her current state.

My steps were fast and deliberate when the call of my name had me altering my trajectory toward one of my other goals. Bex was sitting a long table waving her arm so vigorously that I thought it might fly off while Sam was incorporating my name in some failed song. Axel occupied another seat at the table with an unreadable look somewhere between control and joyful knowing.

Across from them sat someone I didn't recognize. Her blonde hair was vibrant and flowing and there was something familiar but with her back to me it was hard to tell. She seemed to rise in slow motion, her hand gripping the chair to keep her unsure legs under her but the moment her clear blue eyes met mine my steps stalled. The rosy cheeks and crinkled smile were displayed on a face that I'd come to memorize over the last seven years. 

Tears rolled down her soft cheeks while her bottom lip picked up a tremble.

"Kyra," She said the words so softly, so familiarly.

It was impossible. She'd been unconscious. She'd been on the edge of death just the other day and yet she was standing before me exactly the way I'd remembered her before that night. The coffee abandoned on a nearby table I found myself back tracking, the onslaught of emotion proving too much. She couldn't be alive and yet she was. I'd accepted on some level that she would never return to me and I'd been wrong. 

"I'm sorry," I whispered before bolting for the nearest exit. 

It was easy to pretend I'd done nothing wrong when she was laying unconscious, easy to process my feelings when she couldn't respond but now? She would blame me, I was sure of it, how could she not? It was my fault she was in this mess and my fault she'd been hurt that night. If I'd been stronger or smarter than she would have been safe. I shouldn't have even let her save me seven years ago and at the very least I should have gone on my own in order to keep her out of harms way. She would still have her mate. She would still have some sliver of happiness left in this hellish life but now all she had was me and all I brought her was death.