𝐁𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐃𝐒𝐈𝐃𝐄𝐃 | satoru gojo

03 | Take Responsibility, Damn It

"... huh? A what?"

Yūji and Megumi stood before Gojō's door, with the latter quickly explaining to their teacher about the incident going on in the common room. Just like his students, Gojō had been looking forward to enjoying some time off of his teaching duties, and had taken advantage of the beginning of their break by going out the previous night for celebratory drinks with his colleagues. As he stood before his two students, still dressed in the outfit he had worn to the bar, the strong scent of alcohol made Yūji crinkle up his nose in revulsion.

"Please come and see for yourself," insisted Fushiguro brusquely, stepping aside and indicating for Gojō to follow him to the common room.

"The baby's crying so much, it's not even funny," sobbed Yūji, burying his face in his hands as Gojō lazily trudged out of his bedroom. "What do we do with a baby?! And why is it here?!"

"Seriously..." mumbled Gojō, clutching his head in one hand as he trailed after his students. "I hope you're all pulling a prank on me. And if you are, it's not funny! I only got back to school like... an hour ago! I need to sleep this off!"

"... trust me, I wish we were joking."

As the trio approached the student common room, Gojō's attention was piqued as he recognised the shrill cries of a baby.

"Surely I'm still hallucinating," he muttered to himself, shaking his head clear as he stepped into the common room and saw the second year students huddled around the table. They parted upon hearing Gojō enter, letting him see the wailing infant with his own eyes. The baby was quite visibly distressed, but the longer the group stood and stared at it, the more unbearable its shrieks became.

"Gojō-sensei," said Maki firmly, looking at her teacher. "This child appeared out of nowhere, and according to Itadori-kun, it's been here since early in the morning. How did it get here, and what should we do about it?"

"First of all, we should do something about its crying," winced Nobara, plugging her ears as the baby's cries intensified. Beside her, Panda and Toge did the same, and soon the whole room was full of people covering their ears.

"Maybe it's hungry?" yelled Panda, earning a nod from Toge.

"Well, if you two hadn't gotten so loud, it would still be asleep!" Maki turned to Nobara and Yūji in annoyance, her own hands cupped over her ears as she chastised them over the baby's voice.

"At least we know it's not dead now! Sensei, what do we do?"

Although the migraine from his hangover was increasing rather exponentially, Gojō sighed and dropped his fingers from his ears.

"Is this all from the bag?"

"Yes. There are clothes, towels, baby wipes, diapers, a tin of baby formula, a couple of empty baby bottles, a brown paper bag, and a notebook," declared Maki. "We were leaving the notebook and paper bag for you to have a look at."

"Well, let's see if it has anything useful in it," grumbled Gojō, reaching out and picking up the notebook. It was a simple spiral notebook with a plain brown cover, and on the front was the title "How to take care of Keigo" scrawled in black marker.

"Right, here we go..." Gojō opened the notebook to the first page, and was greeted by the sight of an index. "'How to prepare bottles', 'how to change his diaper', 'how to put him to sleep' ... oh, here we go. 'What to do when he cries.' 

"Are you kidding me? Someone left a guidebook on how to take care of their baby? How long are they planning on leaving it here?!"

Gojō cleared his throat loudly, silencing his students.