The Hateful Heavy Heart | 18+

23 - Christmas in Memphis: Part One

On Christmas day, it was cold. Even for Tennessee. It would be as low as thirty-five degrees in the evening, the weather app shared. I let out a sigh and put my phone down on my nightstand.

I was excited for the day, but in many ways, I was tired. My pregnancy was beginning to take a toll on my body. It was something that I wasn't entirely prepared for.

All of the things that I enjoyed eating, the growing human inside of me seemed to hate. One wrong move and my body was a punching bag.

I climbed out of the bed, attempted a small stretch of extending my arms, and walked to the bathroom. My baby was small, but they were mighty. It was admirable in a sense, but also painful. Fatigue was weighing on me. No matter how much I tried to relax, I had no energy.

I walked to the bathroom and pushed the door closed behind me. The mirror presented an image of me that I struggled with; the weight was different. While that wasn't the issue, as I knew I'd grow with the child inside of me, I seemed to carry the weight of the day in my face. My eyes looked tired. I was tempted to have a day where I enjoyed my small makeup collection.

Ruggiero had gone back to his house for a bit, to grab some things, he'd explained.

I was alone with my thoughts, and alone with my child.

I observed my reflection as I rubbed a hand on my stomach. "Please, be kind today. It's a holiday."

I took my attention off of the mirror and turned the water on for a shower. I waited for the water to get not quite hot, but warm before stepping in, hoping it soothed my body. One admirable thing pregnancy gave me was that my hair seemed healthier. That would make things easier in terms of being able to feel good tonight.

I loved feeling beautiful, and lately, I hadn't been.

I kept my shower quick, sure to give a good scrub. However, I wasn't in the mood to stand and ponder. I just wanted to have a good day.

I turned the water off and pushed the curtain to the side. I grabbed my towel and wrapped it around my body. Before leaving the bathroom, I was sure to wash my face. It was nothing major, just a light cleanser. I gave it a gentle massage and washed it off with warm water. With my towel, I patted my face dry. I used the complementing moisturizer in hopes to keep my skin from appearing dry.

In my room, I finished drying off. I looked for something to wear that would hang on my body nicely. I wasn't ready to reveal my pregnancy to everyone yet, and currently, my stomach was small enough to just be able to hide it.

I chose a black shift dress, long-sleeved and adorned with frills at the hems. I decided to wear it with a black pair of flats.

Ruggiero came back just as I was doing my makeup. I'd started to do a black winged eyeliner.

"Red lipstick?" he asked me.

"I was considering it."

"Well, even with only one eye, you look beautiful. Whatever you decide, you will still look beautiful." He kissed me on my forehead.

After that, he disappeared into the living room.

To Ruggiero's delight, I did decide to do a red lipstick. I also decided on a thick, black mascara to complement the eyeliner.

Once my makeup was completed, I found him sitting in the front room, scrolling through the channels on the television. He paused to catch my gaze and I watched as his lips spread into a genuine smile. "Dolcezza, you look gorgeous."

"You look pretty good yourself," I returned.

He did. Ruggiero was dressed in a nice, dark button-down, a deep burgundy on silk fabric. He complimented the shirt with a nicely pressed pair of black pants and a modest pair of black dress shoes.