I don't know anymore! -A Jilly story (FTRS)

Animals are angels

***Sunday around 11 a.m. ***

I fell asleep late, like really late but I was still the first one up. That's how it always is now, I'm always the last one asleep and the first one awake and that's if I even manage to fall asleep. Everytime I close my eye they're there. Alva and Stiltskin and Anna tricking me into using the harp or something. They were always there, and even though I know they're gone it won't make them go away. They still haunt me in my nightmares, they have since that fateful day when we got rid of them and they might continue to forever. I knew Alva had planned to kill me, but it had never been as real as it was then. It had never been so.. intense.

I was walking around outside, contemplating whether or not I should go for a pegasus ride. I didn't want the others to worry if they had trouble finding me but riding Macho always helped me calm down. It made me feel free, which was the opposite of what my dreams and the interviews I had half the time I saw my friends now. I decided I was going for a pegasus ride and that if my friends really did worry it would be easy for them to find me, they all know I love Macho, espicially Jax.

So, with that decided, I walked off toward the stables. When I reached the stable, one of the stable-hands (the guys who take care of the pegasi) saw me. He was one of the ones who was always there. "Hiya, Gilly. Y'want to take Macho for a ride? No ones using them today and he's here," He asked in a very friendly manner. He was very friendly.

"That would be wonderful," I respond, trying my hardest to return his friendly voice so he wouldn't think my mood had something to do with him. He smiled and walked off to get Macho for me.

"You still riding with pads? You only have to wear the helmet, according to how much time you've logged flying," He said reappearing with my favorite pegasus. Sometimes I forget how much I actually do- did this.

"Just the helmet, then, please." I said and smiled. Macho nusseled my forhead with his snout, as he knew how I was really feeling. I smiled and reached up to stroke his mane, he neighed in apruval. The stable-hand nodded and walked off a ways to grab the helmet.

"Here ya go," He said handing me the helmet which I took and strapped onto my head. "Boy, he likes you."

"The feelings mutual, he's quite the pegasus." I said and smiled, climbing onto Macho's back with little effort. I stroked his mane gently, and he nieghed again and began to fly.

Truth be told, it's probably a good thing pegasi can't tell other people about your thoughts or Macho could tell the whole world every secret I have. Not that I think he would. Macho is my most trusted, most favorite pegasus. He was the first one I rode and I'd be happy if he was the only one I ever rode as long as the both of us lived.

We got up pretty high and I took a deep breath of clean, free air. "I almost forgot what freedom felt like." I said to the pegasus. "I wish I had more time to do this." Macho neighed, almost like he was reminding me I didn't have to talk for him to understand. I laughed a little and then I sighed. "I've missed this."

"Boo!" Someone yelled from behind me, though in this case I knew exactly who someone was. Kayla. I sighed. I loved my friends, I really did, but I wanted to be alone with Macho and the sky. The vast, open sky...

"Can I have a little bit? I kinda came up here to be alone, K." I said, hoping she wouldn't be upset.

"Oh, so you don't want to hang-out with us anymore? You'd rather spend time with a flying horse?" Kayla said, she sounded annoyed. "I- sorry. I just wish thing could be a little more like the used to be."

"I get it. Really, I do, I just need some time. Okay?" I asked giving her a smile.

"Okay! But you better come to the library after and hang-out with us!" She said smiling again.