Rabid Cur (Kylo Ren x Reader)

Chapter Eighteen (Kylo's POV)

Hi guys, this is a long chapter and is in first person but it is very important and is a turning point for this story! Enjoy.

Kylo's POV

A soft hum came from her lips as she turned over and grabbed the blankets, pulling them tightly around her. Her eyelids fluttered for a millisecond before she moved closer to me.

I couldn't sleep.

My mind would not stop replaying our kiss, the kiss that she initiated. All of the events of last night were being replayed over and over again. The frigidness outside, seeing her wrapped up in the most adorable way. Her concentrated face as she was sucked into her data pad for hours on the way here. The way she called me Master Ren, making my cock twitch at those words I've always wanted to hear fall from her lips. Her repeated, "No," after I told her I'd sleep on the floor.

Fuck I was in deep.

The fact that she cared enough about my well-being and was even okay with me in a bed with her, after all she had endured from the disgusting men onboard...

It made my heart skip a fucking beat.

My knights, the closest people in my life would have never cared about that. No one would've. I knew it was going to be cold as fuck on that floor but I didn't care, all I wanted was for her to feel safe here. She had been hurt by men so many times before, I didn't want to make myself another. I refused to.

My tether to her was so strong, I often wondered if she felt it too. It was constantly pulled on, the need she felt to see me consistently growing, and I the same. It only became stronger with our kiss, like our bodies melded into one, my soul attaching to hers. It was the strangest yet most intoxicating feeling. I didn't want to stop it but I had to, I didn't want her to feel like she was making a mistake.

Our bond however only grew and was now more than that, it was a primal instinct. I had to be with her twenty-four hours a day, I had to know she was okay all the fucking time. And miraculously, I didn't even mind that I felt this way.

She had no one back on base who truly cared for her. That blonde friend of her's was a user, living in her quarters the whole time we were gone on the last mission. Who does that?

And that annoying fucking weasel, the stormtrooper who protected her. She didn't think I had been reading her until recently but I always had access to her thoughts. And I knew good and well that his repulsive self had been trying to make moves on her. And for fucks sake, she had been falling for it! My fierce, honest to the point it hurt, beautiful girl was actually starting to like his sweet nature.

Absolutely un-fucking-believable.

She was mine.

Her body tossed and turned as she tried to get comfortable. Her beautiful face curling into the pillow, desperate for warmth. I couldn't stop staring at her.

She was perfect.

I was hopelessly obsessed with the thought that someone as pure as her could ever mirror my feelings. And by some goddamn miracle it was happening. But was last night just a fluke? I knew from her thoughts that she repented my actions and those onboard as well. She was disgusted by death, abuse, everything that I took pride in doing. It was obvious that she never would've set foot here without her father's legacy.

But I still held onto hope that one day she could be at peace with the Order and accept her position onboard. I don't know what I would do if she ever found it within herself to leave, I would crumble. And I knew that there was a piece of her that wanted to escape desperately.