As I Am

Don't Stop Me Now

"I'll start with you two," the teacher said as she lead us to the booths. "The rest of you, go to your booths, get situated and set up the equipment. Madeline, you'll be using the Fender only today, the rest of the guitars are behind the locked doors and I don't have the key with me, I'll bring it tomorrow."

Everyone nodded and went their ways. Ava and I followed the teacher silently. She unlocked the booth doors and let us in. Booth then was slightly bigger than the rest of them, on account of it meant to house up to eight people and not the normal four. On the downside, it didn't really have a PA system to brag about, only a pair of some foreign studio monitors and a basic amp.

The teacher walked in and unlocked the cages where the KORG and Roland were stored. I glanced at Ava and grinned as I saw her eyes almost glimmer and her fingers danced in the air as she was looking at the keyboards.

"Don't touch the KORG for now," the teacher said. The audio cables are broken and we'll get them replaced next week. Can you use a Fantom, Ava?" She asked and looked at her.

Ava nodded nervously and mumbled, "Y--yes, I--I have one at home..." My eyes almost bulged out of my skull. She has a Fantom at home?! And I have a couple of hundred bucks worth of Yamaha in my closet. Not that I could even use a Fantom, but man am I jelly. Some people have all the toys.

"Thalia," the teacher said and turned to face me. "You can operate the amp, I know. The mics are all in the box right there. One of the Shures is broken, I think. Try them. The interface is on near the stand there." She said and pointed at the mic stand. The place where I would be standing in just a moment, singing with Ava...

My heart did some weird gymnastics and suddenly I was very nervous about the whole thing. I almost asked the teacher to let me leave, but she was already at the door.

"Don't break stuff, you two," she said, then looked left and right. "Just between the three of us," she said and lowered her voice. "I'm trusting you two the most. Thalia, you're by far our most talented singer, and Ava, you can do both, but there are no other keyboard player as talented as you. Even if everybody else screws it up, you two can save our show." She said and smiled at us. "Please get along."

She left and closed the door behind her. Ava and I looked at each other and both of us turned our gazes away slightly embarrassed and awkward. I walked to the mic box and looked into it. I wasn't in the mood for having a fight with a mic, so I just picked the AKG mic and set it up. Thankfully the interface was the same I had at home, so it wasn't a problem to set it to my liking.

After setting it up, I glanced over at Ava, who was nervously looking at me. I raised my eyebrow at her, and she looked down shyly. I felt something in my throat and had to swallow heavily. Ava looking nervously down just looked so... cute, there was no other way to put it. She looked amazingly cute to my eyes.

"Tha--Thalia," she said softly. "Help me with this thing?" She said and pointed at the keyboard. Oh yeah. Those things are heavy. I nodded at her and we lifted it to the stand next to the mic.

She switched it on and I had to suppress a chuckle. Her lips turned upwards in a cute smile and her eyes almost sparkled as the thing came to life. Her fingers jumped around the keyboard as she selected that option and turned this knob, setting it up as she wanted.

She pulled the chair next to it, sat down, put her hands on the keys and closed her eyes. What happened next defied any description with words. Her fingers danced like pixies in a mushroom circle. Her face looked calm, almost serene, and her lips turned into a content smile. She mouthed words silently with her lips moving only ever so slightly.

The sounds that came from the device that her fingers made it make left me breathless. The chords flowed into each other, the melody danced in the air like a warm summer day's memory in the deep of the winter. She didn't look at her fingers at all, or even have her eyes open. Her hands moved, her fingers danced and the music came alive.

She flicked her wrists, touched a button there, turned a knob there and in the matter of seconds the sound changed and she switched to a different tune. It was more dark, more feeling, more.. sad. I looked at her, glanced at the mic and knew what I had to do.

I stepped in front of the stand, turned the mic on, and flicked the amp on. Then I sung. I didn't know any lyrics, I didn't know where she went with the tune, I didn't know what I was doing, but somehow I felt it. I let my voice join her music and just let it all out.

I closed my eyes and sung. I hadn't sung like that since... since I couldn't even remember when. It felt so good, so right. Her music drew my voice out of me like nothing ever did. We didn't need notes, we didn't need lyrics. Everything just melded together, her music and my voice.

I took a deep breath and sung from the bottom of my heart, letting all of my longing for my parents, my irritation against Marie, my fondness for Madeline, my new and weird feelings towards Ava into it. When I finished, I noticed she had stopped playing and was looking at me with her eyes wide open. Her hands still on the keys. When I closed my eyes, she lowered them down and a quiet and long final chord filled the room.

I felt my cheeks blush and I turned my face downwards. Oh crap, what is she thinking about me now. What if she hates it? What if--

"Y--you... Y--you have a... beautiful voice," she said softly, and wiped a tear out of her cheek. "I--I've never heard anyone... sing... like that..." She said quietly and looked down.

"I'm sorry!" I said. "You were playing so beautifully and I just joined in without asking you, I'm sorry!" I said. She looked up and tilted her head, then shook it lightly.

"Your voice..." She said and wiped away another tear. "Thalia... I've played this song for years. It's something I came up with when I was a child. But I've always felt it wasn't good enough, that there was something missing from it. But... now... I know I was right. It was your voice. What the song required was not lyrics that I've been hitting my head over for years. It was not a new chord, not a new intro. It was your voice."

I just stared at her. My voice? I blinked at her a few times. "My voice...?" I managed to say. She nodded.

"I never knew anyone could sing like that.. so much feeling and no words. How do you do it?" She asked. I just shrugged. Now that I thought about it, I didn't even know myself.

"I... I don't know," I said and smiled sheepishly at her. "I don't really know what I did. I just listened to your music and something inside me wanted to sing so badly I just did it."

I stepped closer and she rose up from the chair. We stood almost nose to nose. She was standing so close I could feel the hear coming from her body, smell her fragrance. She smelled like summer nights; flowers, warmth, stories around a campfire, lush forests. I looked into her eyes and swallowed hard. It was suddenly very difficulty to breath easily. My breath kept getting caught in my throat, my cheeks got warm. All the hairs in my neck stood up.

I looked slightly downwards. She was much taller than me, so I was practically looking at her boobs, which didn't make it any easier for me. I had to raise my gaze, and I stared at her lips. The black lipstick had worn partly away and I could see her natural pink lips shining through it. Her lips were partially open and she was breathing heavily too.

The air between us seemed to be filled with electricity. Neither of us were able, or even wanted to, move. We stood staring at each other for what felt like half an eternity. My heart was trying to escape it's bony prison and I felt my feet beginning to wobble. I lifted my hand before I even realized it myself. She did the same and our fingertips met in the middle.

There was almost a jolt and a wave of warmth pulsed through my entire body when our fingers brushed against each other. I opened my mouth to say something, anything, but never made it. The teacher opened the door and stepped into the room. We quickly retreated, she sat on the chair and I stood in front of the mic. Both of us were blushing madly and I could feel the heat on my ears.

"How's it going here?" The teacher said and looked at us. She raised one eyebrow at us. "What's up with you? Don't tell me you broke something? Have you gotten everything to work?"

I just nodded furiously to her, Ava made a small grunting sound and nodded once.

The teacher closed the door as she stepped in. "Alright, let me hear it then. How do you work together?" She said.